Old lady looking at Underworld: Man, that Kate Beckinsale is really hot. I would so do her.
–Public Library
Overheard by: Robyn
Old lady: No, man, I ain’t doin’ no E! I ain’t done no E in years!
–86th & Lex
Old lady with cane grumbling to self about jaywalker: Did you see that? He almost got hit by that cab. Too bad — he deserved to die!
–Outside Sarge’s, 36th & 3rd
Overheard by: Goofa Sutra Yogini
Old man: How do I love thee? Let me count the ways… Pie.
–Brighton Beach
Old black lady on pay phone: ‘Do me up the butt’? No, no, honey. That is not the proper way to address a girl.
–96th & Broadway
Overheard by: davees
Old man: What we need in America is more nappy-headed black women on television. That’s what we need to fight for.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Holly Kaye