Lady hobo: Y’all got some money up in here?! [Long pause] I’ll take some food… A fruit, a coke, a twizlah, a bag of chips, a hair comb. I will eat anything you give me! I ain’t ashamed! [Longer pause] Shoot. Aight. I’ll sing. I’ll goddamn sing y’all a song. Any of you object to this? Anyone object to me singing a goddamn lovely song? ‘Cause I’ll do it. Sir, sir, you object? Miss? [Passengers begin to laugh.] Okay, this is the last call for anyone who objects. One, two, three… [Starts singing old southern tune].
High school thug: Yo, is this shit too late to object to? Shut the fuck up.
–Brooklyn-bound F train
Overheard by: CrappedMyPantsOut
