You're That Guy Every Day.

Girlfriend: I'm gonna get a black wig and a skirt, and I'm putting body-glitter on you and doing your hair like you're in 90210 and you're going as Edward. It'll be like ironic.
Boyfriend: I'm gonna put some mayonnaise on my pants and go as that “jizzed in my pants” guy.
Girlfriend: No, you're not.

Gainesville, Florida