$5 a Handjob Just Doesn't Stretch As Far As It Used to

Nigerian pharmacy assistant: Okay, is $50.00.
Overweight middle aged man: For that?! That tiny cream!? Forget it.
Nigerian pharmacy assistant: You don't want?
Overweight middle aged man: Nah, no thanks. I'll go with the rash.

–CVS Pharmacy

Overheard by: Jonathan Ferrantelli