Proud Asian father to friend: And my little one here, he's going to be a football player when he grows up!
Little Asian boy: No way, Jose! I'm gonna be a Power Ranger!

–East Flatbush, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Frado

Teen girl: Something must have gone wrong during her wax.
Teen boy: What was it?
Teen girl: I don’t know. She was, like, crying. And she hasn’t gotten another wax. I just don’t get it.
Teen boy: Sucks for her.
Teen girl: Seriously.

–Broadway & Prince

Overheard by: still speechless

Red-faced toddler in stroller: Nooooo!
Dad: Once more, with feeling!

–82nd & 2nd

Overheard by: Jamie

Mother, to twelve-year-old daughter: Megan! Get back here!
Four-year-old boy: Mommy, Megan is trying to cross the street cuz she hates you.
Mother, bitterly: No, Megan is trying to cross the street because she wants to get hit by a car.
Four-year-old: If you get hit by a car you’d be dead, then you have to go to the hospital.
Mother, despondent: I don’t think you even understand death.


Girl: I had a wonderful childhood. (looks at photos of a child)
Boy: Yeah? I fuckin' had to listen to Tim Curry narrating nursery rhymes… That's terrifying.

–Pier 92

Boy, 7: Daddy, I wanna see the Empire State Building.
Father: Sorry, son. That’s way uptown and we’re headed downtown.

–48th & Broadway

Overheard by: Christopher Mignemi

Girl to boy: I just got this computer software that's supposed to, like, speeden my reading comprehension.
Boy to girl: Oh…right, right, I saw that shit on tv.

–147th & Amsterdam

Little boy: She was nice
Snobby mother: Yeah… but she was too fat.

–79th & Amsterdam

Teen boy: They should have a test for eveyone coming out of high school to weed out the stupid kids from the gene pool. If you don’t pass, you die.
Teen girl: Yeah, like how momma hamsters eat their babies when they know they won’t make it in the real world.

–6 train

Teen kid #1: Yo white people have too much free time to do stupid shit.
Teen kid #2: Yeah, I know: like jump off 30-story buildings, like those two kids.
Teen kid #1: Yeah, I once saw this white guy who tried to jump over a car and got split in two, like the car was coming at him, and he tried to jump, but it hit him and split him in two pieces right down the middle.
Teen kid #2: For real, you saw that happen?
Teen kid #1: Yeah.
Teen kid #2: Like in person, you saw it happen?
Teen kid #1: Yeah, I saw it happen in person on TV last night.

–5 Train

Overheard by: b