Chick #1: Did you eat anything tonight?
Chick #2: No. I haven’t been eating much lately, but not in the unhealthy way.
–Bowery & Spring
Archive for the ‘Anorexic’ Category
Unless Cocaine and Penises Count
Chubby girl: I need to lose some weight before I go on vacation. What did you eat when you went on your three-day diet?
Anorexic girl: Uh…I didn’t.
–Union Square
It’s Her Ex
Anorexic JAP on cell: …No money, so I stopped dating him.
Hobo: Whore.
Anorexic JAP, to hobo: Excuse me?
Hobo: Nice thighs — have another doughnut.
–East Village
Finally My Friendship with You Begins to Pay Off
Skinny girl: I ate the whole bag.
Fat girl: I know.
Skinny girl: But, like… The whole bag.
Fat girl: I know… If it makes you feel any better, I had fried chicken wings and chocolate cake on Friday.
Skinny girl: … Yeah, that does make me feel better.
–Pratt Institute
Calista Flockhart Must Feel So Forgotten
Chick #1: Well, no, you look better now, but you were never that skinny, I mean, I never looked at you like “she needs a sandwich”, like…
Chick #2: No, but I haven’t gained any weight, really; my clothes still fit.
Chick #1: But you were never grotesque, like what’s her name.
Chick #2: Nicole Ritchie.
Chick #1: Yeah.
–55th & 8th
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Wednesday Doesn’t Eat Enough to Keep a One-Liner Alive
Skinny professor: John* [a chubby professor] and I started Weight Watchers together at the same time!
–Hostos Faculty Dining Room
Overheard by: glad she’s leaving
Skinny girl to clerk: Hi, do you have a soy-based, non-dairy substitute for heavy cream?
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Overheard by: office peon loves Thanksgiving food
Girl ordering Coffee Coolatta with skim milk: I hope this tastes as good as it did when I was anorexic. Everything tasted good back then…
–Dunkin Donuts, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: allison
Jewish grandmotherly type: Women with anorexia seem to have such strange eating habits.
–Upper West Side
Anorexic-looking girl: I want a tic tac. I’m hungry.
–95th & 2nd
The New Wilson Phillips Song is Kinda Catchy
Anorexia: Come on baby, we gotta move.
Manboobs: Stop pulling me down, fat ass.
–Penn Station
Today I Swallowed Some of My Own Spit, So I’m Good
Anorexic #1: I didn’t not eat for three days, I just didn’t really…
Anorexic #2: Eat?
Anorexic #1: Yeah.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: the expeditor
Once Again: Nothing Tastes as Good as Thin Feels
Well-dressed girl #1: You know what?
Well-dressed girl #2: What?
Well-dressed girl #1: Throwing up at work really isn’t as bad as it seems.
–Prince Street
Chick #1: …so, I got these laxatives.
Chick #2: Did you take them?
Chick #3: No, but I never eat. I have, like, one orange a day.
–Columbus Circle
Girl: It might be time for anorexia.
–Columbia University gym
Overheard by: djlindee
A woman can be heard vomiting in the bathroom.
Maitre d’: Did she drink too much or is she just watching her weight?
–Pastis, 9th Avenue
Overheard by: Initials
Wednesday One-liners Watch What They Eat
Fortysomething dude: Don’t tell me I don’t know about metabolism! I have known about metabolism my entire life. Metabolize yourself!
–The Gate, Park Slope
Overheard by: Moochy and D‑Rock
Girl on cell: I don’t want to talk about your eating disorder every fucking time we talk!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: mondo man
