MC guy: Okay everyone, I need a verb!
Girl: Crysturbate!
MC guy: Cry…what?
Girl: It’s like, when you’re sad and you masturbate!
–Kimmel Center, Washington Square South
Overheard by: Athena
Woman: …so, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to masturbate or cry!
–Comfort Diner, West 23rd Street
