I’m Demoting You to Provisionally‐Exclusive

20‐ish girl: Dammit, why aren’t you coming to my party?
20‐ish guy: I told you — I have to go to DC that night with my family.
20‐ish girl: How am I going to show off my terribly attractive boyfriend to all my other less‐attractive boyfriends if you’re not going to be there?!

–L train