Romeo and Juliet: Shakespeare’s First Draft

Teen boy: I couldn’t put it all the way in, though.
Teen girl: Ew, ew, ew.
Teen boy: I don’t know how they do that in pornos.
Teen girl: One second — are you gay?
Teen boy: Not really. Like, I’d totally do you.
Teen girl: You wish! Got Jake’s shit all over your dick. Ain’t no way.

–Smiling Pizza, 7th Ave, Park Slope

Headline by: Malingerer

Runners-Up:

· “Bi-curiousity killed the pussy” – Mojosaves

· “Have your jake and eat it too” – teensaredisgusting

· “He called ‘no homo'” – Jedipus

· “He probably couldn’t put it all the way in, because he’s not willing to come all the way out” – Ryan

· “Jake the German Shepherd was extra eager to meet his master that night.” – Adrenna

· “Methinks the lady doth protest too much” – assley

· “The Straw That Brokeback Mountain” – B

· “The shit washes off. The gay? Not so much.” – Sean

· “Then How ’bout a Dirty Sanchez?” – Hobo Whisperer

· “When the front door slams shut, sometimes the back door opens” – steve devan

· “You say tomato, I say hepatitis” – Mark Poepsel


Click here to see the new Headline Contest