Wednesday One-liners are Out in the Streets

Hobo: Shit, I’m jus’ tryin’ ta get me some pussy and a beef sandwich.

–Union Square

Overheard by: Jason K

Old bag lady: I’m looking for some change, some food, or a sexual partner.

–Lafayette & Great Jones

Hobo: I have something to say! I fucked your daughter! And she liked it! And she was tight!

–W. 4th & University

Overheard by: Snezhana Valdman

Hobo: Too many Police investigations stopping you from reaching your destination? I may be homeless, but I got a brain. It may not be a big brain, but it’s usingable!

–Staten Island ferry

Overheard by: Joel Guilbert

Hobo: Well, since you won’t give me money, one more thing. Has your sister or girlfriend, I don’t know who she is, ever told you that bag does not go with that coat?

–45th & 9th

Overheard by: Paul Schellenberg

Drunk hobo: Hey girl! You look like Aretha Franlin! R-E-S-E-C-P-T! R-E-S-E-C-P-T! Give me some respect!

–Union Square

Overheard by: Evan

Hobo: It’s 90 degrees out. Why are we wearing clothes? That’s mental illness.

–Rockefeller Center station