Cop on megaphone: Hand over your license and your registration. Now everyone in the Heights knows what I am waiting for.
–138th St & Amsterdam Ave.
Overheard by: tony l.
Hobo: I’m just black. I’m not a criminal.
–Outside MSG
Overheard by: Barry P.
Female cop, screaming out the window of her police car: Stop yelling on the street!
–Greenwich Ave & W 13th St
Overheard by: Pierce
White teen boy: You see, you can only mess with white people and Asian people because the worst thing they’ll do is call the cops. Anybody else–no one will ever hear from you again.
–1 train, southbound
Overheard by: Stephanie Shestakow
Hobo: Stand clear of the closing doors. You cannot block the doors. Keep your belongings with you at all times. If you see a suspicious package or activity, tell a police officer or MTA employee or me. My wife died and I want you to know that I’m single. I may not have any money, but I got plenty of honey. I want all the ladies to know that I’m single. Not the men, though. I’m not gay. I’m a lesbian. I like women.
–Downtown 5 train
Cop car, driving in bike lane, on loudspeaker: Move right. Move right! Your other right, idiot!
–8th Ave & 28th St
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Thug: I hate white people. They’re always talking to the cops.
–1st Ave & 89thSt