Nu-metal kid: Man, I haven’t been arrested in so long!
–St. Mark’s Place & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Barrie
Teen boy commandeering speaker: Next stop: Riker’s Island.
–Uptown 1 train
Overheard by: Victoria
Black tranny to another: Honey, that’s the worst thing you can be called up in jail!
–Christopher & Greenwich St.
Overheard by: Walking away even faster
Ghetto mom on phone: If you report it they’ll have to arrest the both of us.
–Cablevision office, Brooklyn
Middle-aged wankster: Yo, I rubbed ‘Get Money Oil’ on my apron one time, and that week I got fired from fuckin’ three jobs and I got fuckin’ arrested! Don’t fuckin’ mess with witchcraft!
–Coldstone, 6th Avenue
Overheard by: rpk
Old teacher: Teaching tenth grade isn’t so bad. By that time the rotten ones don’t bother to show up or they’re already in jail.
–E train
Overheard by: jobee
White, mid-40s nerd petting dog: You know, I think it’s really funny how a guy can pet a dog and everyone thinks he’s the nicest guy in the world, but the second he does it to a stranger on the street, they wanna lock him in jail.
–Marquet Cafe, E 12th St.
Overheard by: Grace
