Bus driver to lady at stop: There are three more buses behind me! They like to stick together! They don’t like to be alone!
–B41 bus
Bus drive: Next stop, Queensborough Community College — where dreams come true. If you ever thought of going back to college, but are too scared, thinking, ‘Oh, I’m too old,’ well, you should go to school. Now arriving at QCC… And remember, knowledge is power.
–Q27 Bayside bus
Overheard by: Caro-kun
Bus driver, about traffic jam: Ladies and gentlemen, Fifth Avenue will be the next stop. We will be arriving in seven to ten days. [Minutes later] Attention! The waiter will be around shortly to take your dinner orders. The next crosstown movie will be Gone with the Wind.
–M79 bus
Bus driver: Does anyone know the route once we get to the airport? If you do, please step forward.
–M60 bus to LaGuardia
Overheard by: Stephen B.
Bus driver to woman running towards the stop as the bus slows down: Calm down, lady! There isn’t any crack that way! Relax!
–Atlantic Ave
Bus driver, as passengers are disembarking: Leave my kingdom. Education is just two minutes away.
–B1 bus, Kingsborough College
Overheard by: Robert