Residence halls

NYU girl #1: Crack babies aren’t that bad.
NYU girl #2: Yeah. You’re addicted to crack, but you don’t experience it!

–Hayden Residence Hall, Washington Square

NYU girl #1: That's super cas.
NYU girl #2: That's a super abrev.

–Lafayette Residence Hall

NYU girl #1: There is hair everywhere in my life.
NYU girl #2: Really?
NYU girl #1: It’s literally in everything I eat.

–NYU Dorm

Freshman #1: Oh, look, there’s Joe*. Does he still do cocaine?
Freshman #2, whispering: Well, no. But now he lives on caffeine pills… [Then, more dramatically] And Mountain Dew.
Freshman #1, gasping: Oh my god!

–Columbia dorm

Roommate #1 scrubbing carpet: Do you think I’m making this look worse?
Roommate #2: I think the only way you could make it look worse is by throwing up on it again…

–Fordham University dorm

Overheard by: Raquel A

NYU girl: When you meet a straight guy can you please introduce him to me?
NYU queer: There’s, like, a waiting list for them.

–Rubin residence hall, NYU