Friend: First you suspect he’s a date rapist, and now you’re worried he isn’t going to call?

–Union Square

Trendy woman: I need to be touched by a man in a loving way…It doesn’t even have to be loving.

—Pirates of the Caribbean 2 advance screening, the Ziegfield

Overheard by: Nick Draven

20-something girl on cell: I just wanna kiss someone!

–M15 bus

Girl: I’m going to make out with someone tonight. I’ve already decided.

–4th St, between 1st & 2nd

Overheard by: Ted

Well-dressed guy: You just hate that you can’t get a one-eyed, homeless black guy to think you’re hot.

–B train

Overheard by: Sugarnuts