NYU girl: I love authentic ethnic food, but not authentic ethnic service. Could you please Americanize your demeanor when you hand me a plate? I like service with a smile.
–Washington Square Park
Emo girl to friend, laughing hysterically, with a huge smile on his face: Stop! You've used up two of my three allotted daily smiles.
–R Train
College boy: We should put them on our penises. So it looks like a smiley face every time we pee.
–Williamsburg
Math teacher, seeing smiley face on board: Is that a penis?
–Hunter College High School
