Eight‐year‐old girl, singing: Fat lips, big lips, get your pregnant lips here!
Out‐of‐breath man on steps: Okay, man, breathe. Breathe like you’re having your first child!
Overheard by: Keep Pushing On!
Pregnant woman on cell: So, yeah, I’m about 5 centimeters dilated, so I’m going to get a Tasti D‑Lite and then go to the hospital.
Hot skinny, Asian girl to hot, skinny, blonde friends: So, am I going to get pregnant this month or what?
–57th & Park
Overheard by: would have liked to help her
Girl on phone: Okay, so I got the pregnancy test and the vodka. We’ll see which one wins.