Eight-year-old girl pointing at bin of toys: Mommy, which one should I get?
Mommy dearest: I don’t give a shit.
–Chinatown
Eight-year-old girl pointing at bin of toys: Mommy, which one should I get?
Mommy dearest: I don’t give a shit.
–Chinatown
Woman #1: I was supposed to go to Detroit tonight.
Woman #2: How far is that?
Woman #3: Eight hours, right? ‘Cause it’s, like, eight hours to Miami.
Woman #1: But Detroit’s in Chicago, not Florida.
Woman #3: Oh, yeah.
–Bowery
Queer: I’m sorry. Did I juice on you?
Tall girl: No, I think I juiced on myself.
–Chinatown
Lady: Excuse me, can you tell me where Chinatown is?
Chinese lady: Chinatown is everywhere! Any way you walk, there’s Chinatown! It’s all around us!
Lady: Thank you [begins walking away from Chinatown].
Chinese lady: Not that way! Come, follow me. This way! Come on!
–Lafayette & Worth
Bimbette #1: Wait, I have to figure out where I am.
Bimbette #2: You are at Broadway and Houston.
Bimbette #1: No, I mean metaphysically…
–Broadway & Houston
Overheard by: KrisNYC
Hipster chick, with gun charm on necklace: Can I get a Diet Coke?
Greek clerk: I like that gun. It looks like the one I keep under my mattress.
–Canal & Eldridge
Chick #1: Thanks, bitch.
Chick #2: I’m obsessed with you!
Chick #1: A restraining order couldn’t stop my love.
–Canal St, Chinatown
Overheard by: i’m scared
NYU guy #1: Do you think the Greeks waxed?
NYU guy #2: What?
NYU guy #1: I mean, they always look so smooth in those statues.
–Lafayette & Walker
Overheard by: Chris
Street vendor: Five dollar.
Browser: No, three dollars.
Street vendor: No, no, five dollar!
Browser: No, I’ll pay three dollars.
Street vendor: No. Five dollar!
Browser: Okay, no thanks.
Street vendor: Yeah, well, you too tall!
–Chinatown
Overheard by: he was pretty tall
Queer: Fuck you! I’m a smart gay!
–23rd & 6th
Overheard by: Keesha Brown
Accidental ironist: Yeah, obviously he has no sense of smartness.
–68th & Lex
Overheard by: Casti
Hipster guy: I erased two years of my life with drugs. Two solid years! But I’m too smart to erase more than that.
–Chinatown bus
Girl on cell: They said that I’m smart, and that I can articulate well. But I’m not… you know… Oh, whatever.
–Queensboro Community College
Overheard by: LizDayglow
Tween boy to dad: I’m looking for a girl who’s younger and smarter.
–71st & West End
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
