Black guy #1: Dude, humans got all sorts of unique smells and shit.
Black guy #2: Man, that’s why dogs love white people.
–Marcus Garvey Park
Black guy #1: Dude, humans got all sorts of unique smells and shit.
Black guy #2: Man, that’s why dogs love white people.
–Marcus Garvey Park
Black guy: Let’s go to the meat market and get some crystal meth.
Buddy: Aight.
–27th & 8th
Overheard by: Shmatty and Shammy
Afro: Shit, nigga, you never heard of Serendipity’s?
Cornrows: Nah.
Afro: It’s a motherfucking ice cream parlor.
Cornrows: Like what? Häagen-Dazs?
Afro: Nah, they charge you up the ass and you’re surrounded by white people.
Cornrows: Like Häagen-Dazs?
Afro: Nah, it’s classy. Fool, don’t you know anything about class?
Cornrows: So it’s like Häagen-Dazs.
Afro: Damn, you ignorant.
–84th & Amsterdam
White guy, about pretty black chick passerby: Yo, why do black girls always look at you but not me?
Black guy: Same reason why you piss close to the urinal and I gotta stand a foot away.
–35th & 6th
Overheard by: Hispanic guy who stands 8 inches away
Black guy, popping white friend’s collar: Man, what’d I tell you about that?
White friend, putting it down: But I don’t want to.
Girl: Leave him alone — he ain’t ready for that yet.
–NYU Kimmel Building
Big black lady exiting movie: Yo, that shit was dumb.
Big black friend: Dumb shit.
Big black lady: For a second I thought it wasn’t going to be dumb… But then it was.
Big black friend: Dumb, dumb, dumb shit.
Big black lady: Dumb!
Big black friend: Man, was that dumb.
Big black lady: Dumb.
–Loews, 34th St
White teen: Can I get you anything else, sir?
Black man, eating: I don’t mean to sound racist, but can I get me some more of that white meat?
–All Souls Soup Kitchen
Overheard by: phia
Black uptown guy: Look at the fruit and shit. We don’t have fruit and shit like this uptown. Look at the mangoes. We never see mangoes that big uptown. [White lady walks by with ugly Pit Bull.]Black uptown girl: Oh, look at the cute puppy! Hello, puppy, how ya doin’?
Black uptown guy: Look at the fucking fruit! We don’t have shit like kiwis uptown. Damn, look at the peaches and plums. They’re much bigger here!
–75th & Broadway
Overheard by: Rahni
Black guy #1: Yes, well, we look alike because we’re fraternal twins.
Black guy #2: Yeah, you didn’t know we were brothers?
White guy: Everyone said you guys were brothers, but I figured they meant ‘brothas’ and not actual brothers.
Black guy #1: Oh… Okay. Hey, look, we’re at Shea.
–LIRR, Shea Stadium
Impatient, middle-aged Caribbean woman in bathroom line: There should be more women’s rooms.
Equally impatient 20-ish woman: Yeah, I know… It’s because men designed these buildings.
–JFK
Overheard by: Nina
