Kid: What’s that?! What’s that?!
Mom, reading magazine: It’s a picture of an airport.
Kid: What happened?!
Mom: Someone was arrested.
Kid: For what?!
Mom: For yelling.
Kid, seriously: At her kids?
–F train
Kid: What’s that?! What’s that?!
Mom, reading magazine: It’s a picture of an airport.
Kid: What happened?!
Mom: Someone was arrested.
Kid: For what?!
Mom: For yelling.
Kid, seriously: At her kids?
–F train
Six-year-old: She didn’t like Ringo!
Mom: Well, who was her favorite Beatle?
Six-year-old: She doesn’t even like the Beatles!
Mom: Don’t talk to her.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: a
Little boy: Daddy, Daddy! Look at the cars! Shoot the cars!
Dad, making finger-gun: Bang, bang, bang, bang!
–12th & 4th
Overheard by: NYU girl
Middle school boy screaming to his father: Just because I like sausages–
Mom, interrupting: –Shhh…
–Brooklyn
Little girl: Mommy used to give me booby, but now she gives the baby booby.
Uncle: That’s what mommies do.
–Staten Island Ferry
Overheard by: greenwood
Rambling six-year-old: … And when she came home, there was a body, and blood was everywhere ’cause he didn’t clean up after he murdered someone, and that’s when she realized–
Bored mom playing with cell: –That her husband was a slob?
–2 train
Overheard by: Good thing I’m neat
Seven-year-old: The devil may be Jewish… The devil may be Jewish!
Father: Quiet, please.
–181st & Haven
Overheard by: Ben Moore
Mother: Did you see your aunt mailed you a present?
Four-year-old boy: No…
Mother: Yes. You can have it when you get home.
Four-year-old boy: Oh. Did she get one for Dustin*, too?
Mother: Yes, and it’s something I think you’ll like, too. It’s a book about sharks and sea monsters.
Four-year-old boy: Oh, Mom, there’s no such things as sea monsters, except back maybe a million years ago when people thought there were.
Mother: Well, sharks are kind of like sea monsters.
Four-year-old boy: No, they’re not!
–F train
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Toddler in stroller: Fuck you! Hahaha! Fuck you! Hahaha!
Tourist mom: Did that baby just say ‘fuck you’? This is the tenth time we’ve been to the city, and I’ve never seen anything that odd.
Tourist daughter: We are on Canal Street, Mom.
Tourist mom: This is very true. Way to go, stroller kid! Yeah!
–Canal St station
Overheard by: AldaRin
Little girl, about hobo wrestling with a bush: Mommy, why is he doing that?
Mother: I don’t know, honey.
Little girl: Maybe he’s the gardener!
Mother: Maybe! Or maybe he’s just fucking crazy.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: tj
