Hobo: Excuse me, is this the Six Train?
Young guy: Yes.
Hobo: Thank you [urinates on rail].
–6 train platform, Astor Pl
Hobo: Excuse me, is this the Six Train?
Young guy: Yes.
Hobo: Thank you [urinates on rail].
–6 train platform, Astor Pl
Scary woman in Che Guevara hat, trying to bite her own back: Asia is occupied!
Man in group of hot chicks: What the fuck?
Scary woman: Two drinks and you can piss in my pussy!
–Sammy’s Asian Gourmet, W 3rd & 6th
Overheard by: Alex
Teen girl #1: So then what happened?
Teen girl #2: So he’s bleeding all over the place, and his friends, his genius friends, say to him, ‘Just piss on yourself!’
–6th Ave, between 43rd & 44th St
Overheard by: Sam
Old frat boy #1: So, I heard you have a pee fetish.
Old frat bay #2: I’m not gonna lie, I’ve peed on some girls in my day.
Old frat boy #1: Awesome.
–Bar, Spring St
Guy #1: I never peed on anybody. Never.
Guy #2, quietly: You peed on me in the shower.
–53rd & 9th
Hobo: Ahhh.
Girlfriend: Ewww, he peed on me!
Boyfriend: And you’re wearing sandals!
–Q train
Hoochie #1: I mean, I guess there are worse things than getting pissed on by Ray J….
Hoochie #2, after long, incredulous pause: Like what?!
–46th & 6th
Overheard by: Still disturbed, even though I know who Kim Kardashian is
Man leaving bathroom stall: I did it my way!
–420 5th Ave
Loud 12-year-old girl in stall, screaming to friends by the sinks: Is it bad that my pee is, like, foamy?
–Barnes & Noble, Park Slope, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Jenn
Young girl exiting porta-potty: I feel sick. I guess I shouldn’t have looked down.
–Prospect Park
Kid in stall: Dad, I’m peeing with one hand behind my back and my eyes closed!
–Toys ‘R’ Us
Overheard by: Sean Bogart
Woman running into bathroom: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, I have to pee! [Enters stall] Phew! Come on… [Starts peeing, then sighs] Oh, thank you, dear Lord, for this glorious opportunity!
–Staten Island Ferry terminal
Overheard by: amila, NOT the Lord
Girl in stall, answering cell: Hello? What? Oh, yeah, sorry. I was totally masturbating when you called.
–Union Square
Teen boy #1, pointing to a bush: That’s where we peed last time.
Teen boy #2: Really?
–Central Park
Dude: So, what did you do?
Hung-over girl: I was really embarrassed at first and I tried to hide it. Then I was like, ‘Fuck it, yeah, I peed in your bed.’
–Restaurant, Chelsea
