Wednesday One-Liners Are Black and White and Read All Over

White girl on cell: Wait, you’re watching BET? Well, do you feel black and/or entertained?

–Union Square

Overheard by: Casey

Black guy: So you see, white bitches just don’t understand that I have a big ass penis.

–St. Mark’s

Teenage black girl: See those buildings over there? That’s where I stay. Yeah, it’s nice and shit. I like it. Too many white people moved in, though. That’s why I’m KKK…Krazy Kracker Killa!

–Uptown 1 train

Overheard by: aq

Black guy to white girl: You’d better not stay in the rain too long; sugar melts!

–117th & 5th

Overheard by: robin b

JAP: It’s not like I don’t like his parties, I just don’t fit in. Hello! I’m white!

–8th St & 5th Ave

Black guy: Well I have black friends, but they just don’t understand. You know what I’m sayin’? Certain races, dog.


Overheard by: Jess McGins

Ghetto girl: What was these two white bitches doing in Harlem at 2:30 in the morning? You know how white they was? They so white they names was Ashley and Haley. That’s how white they was!

–Uptown 5 train

Midwestern tourist points to a black guy and says, to his tween daughter: You see that guy over there? You see how he’s a different color than you? You see that sometimes in big cities.

–Downtown 6 train

Overheard by: Gwen

Black girl to black friend: Yo, man, you’re acting like a black person.

–N train, Ditmars Blvd, Queens

Juicer: Oh, shit! We got customers in the store! We gotta stop acting so black!

–Jamba Juice, University Place

Frustrated woman, who has been trying in vain to hail a cab: What am I, black?

–21st & 6th

Black girl to black friend: We never gonna get a cab unless we start hangin’ with some white folks.

–Orchard & Houston

Overheard by: white folk

Teenage girl: But Bob Dylan is Jewish. That’s kind of black.

–Upper West Side

Black girl: Why we gotta be black all the time? Why can’t we be white for two minutes?

–Wendy’s, W 34th St

JAP: I hate being white!

–66th & Broadway

White teen girl: Now I know what it feels like to be a minority.


White woman to black woman: I feel like I understand the black struggle because I feel I was black in a past life.

–Penn Station

Thug on cell: Black people like catfish also, nigga!

–110th & Broadway

Overheard by: Mappy and Chocolate

Ghetto girl at crosswalk: Ooh, lil’ white man tells me to walk, so I’m walkin’!

–Times Square

Overheard by: bully