Blonde girl: I can’t believe he pulled his dick out. Except not really. Except kind of. Except I kind of had to put it back in.
–W 34th & 8th Ave
Overheard by: innocent bystander
Crazy hobo, to himself: Geritol. Yup, that’s what she needs. That woman just likes some dick. And there ain’t nothin wrong with that. Nothin wrong with a woman likin a long hard dick. Women like dick. Ain’t nothing wrong with that. She’s gonna get some Geritol all right. Cause see, you got to get it up in the crevices. Work it in with a little Bengay.
–Men’s Bathroom, Penn Station
Overheard by: Phil
Salvadoran guy, discussing use of the word “faggot”: They can take a dick up their ass, they can take a fucking joke.
–Lawton St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Eric Frazier
Black guy: Man, I can’t wear tight pants because I have a big dick! My dick needs to breathe! (holds himself)
–Penn Station
Female Central Park crossing guard: Das cuz da dick was great!
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Robert H