Chick #1: My gym teachers always let us sit and read.
Chick #2: What does that work out?
Chick #1: Um, your mind.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: your humble narrator
Chick #1: My gym teachers always let us sit and read.
Chick #2: What does that work out?
Chick #1: Um, your mind.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: your humble narrator
Woman with headphones: ‘Scuuuse me!
Bimbette: What?! I said, ‘Excuse me.’
Woman with headphones: Well, I have on headphones and shades, so obviously I didn’t see or hear you. Ever thought about tapping me on the shoulder, asshole?
Bimbette, opening book called, How to Become Fearless: Well, whatever. I’m already sitting down.
Woman with headphones: That book must being doing something good for your ego. Hope it has a chapter in there on what to do after you get smacked on the train for being fearless…
–A train
Blonde: Oh my god! You can meet the guy from work who harasses me.
Sidekick: Like… sexually harasses?
Blonde: I don’t know, but he’s really annoying.
–Broadway & Broome
Girl holding tally sheet: Do you want to stick this in my thinger?
Male coworker: You’re lucky it’s me. In the real world–
Girl holding tally sheet: –In the real world people wouldn’t take it there.
–NYU SCPS
Overheard by: she’s lucky i’m gay
Dude: Remember that barge that was right on the horizon of the beach on Sunday?
Chick: Yeah, why?
Dude: How far away do you think it was?
Chick: I have no clue. A thousand feet, maybe?
Male passenger: Actually, the horizon at sea level is six to eight miles away.
Chick: So, less than a thousand feet?
–PATH train
Overheard by: Augie
Bimbette #1: Well, we weren’t, like, BFF, but we were, like… F…?
Bimbette #2, nodding knowingly: Mmm.
–Elevator, Columbia University
Overheard by: MarcusII
Chick #1: Okay, what do we want to drink?
Chick #2: If I was Roman, my name would be Emperor Fabulous.
Chick #3: Perrier?
–Deli near Prospect Park
Overheard by: Liz Erd
Chick: I’m kinda concerned about this lotion I started using. It contains semen.
Dude: Ew… But so what?
Chick: Well, I think that it could make me pregnant. Like, the sperm could seep through my pores and then swim through my blood…
Dude: But your pores don’t have fallopian tubes…
Chick: But what if? I bet if I got pregnant, it would be, like, the devil’s baby.
Dude: Yeah, and you probably can’t abort the devil’s baby.
–116th & Broadway
Overheard by: Kate
Chick #1: I wonder why they call it TP-ing a house…
Chick #2: Maybe it stands for ‘toilet paper.’
Chick #1: That doesn’t make any sense!
–74th & Broadway
Overheard by: Kirby J
Black actress onstage: If anymore white people walk in here, we’re gonna become a suburb!
Suburban white girl in audience: I don’t get it.
–Showing of Hairspray
