Girl #1: She’s a neo-con Barbie doll! She’s worse than Ann Coulter.
Girl #2: Not possible.
Girl #1: No, really.
Girl #2: So she’s Dick Cheney with boobs?
–Mercer & Grand
Girl #1: She’s a neo-con Barbie doll! She’s worse than Ann Coulter.
Girl #2: Not possible.
Girl #1: No, really.
Girl #2: So she’s Dick Cheney with boobs?
–Mercer & Grand
Girl #1: No, no, no. That girl is just plain ugly. [Girl #1 falls flat on her face.]Girl #2: Ummm… sorry. I don’t want to be a bitch, but I think that’s what they call karma.
–Columbia University
Girl #1: I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to sleep with him unless we’re in a relationship, but I’m afraid to give him an ultimatum.
Girl #2, after a pause: Well, he wants to sleep with you, so I’m sure he’ll say yes!
–A train
Girl #1: Who is he, again?
Girl #2, screaming: John Norris! He’s old, gap in his teeth, MTV News guy… [Turns and sees he’s been standing right next to her.] Oh! Well, hello there!
–New York Sports Club
Overheard by: anonny
Girl to friend: I mean, guys just don’t understand how much hotter they are when they can dance. I’d totally date a guy who can dance with me.
Random queer: Me, too!
–Q train
Girl #1 after crossing street during “Don’t Walk” sign: Oooh, I’m like a New York City resident!
Girl #2: Why? Because you walked into oncoming traffic?
Girl #1: That’s what they do!
–8th & Broadway
Chick #1: I can’t believe he left me three cans of peas. Like that is going to fix anything.
Chick #2: Were they your favorite peas?
Chick #1: I mean, I like LeSeur Peas and all, but not enough to make me forget my husband was fucking another woman.
–Park Slope
Girl #1: It’s good I don’t go to a school with fraternities. I’d, like–
Girl #2: –Get drunk and raped?
Girl #1: Exactly!
–Sarah Lawrence College
Overheard by: trying to eat dinner in peace
Chick #1: He says he can fall in love with anybody, but he just sleeps with everybody.
Chick #2: Yeah, totally.
Chick #1: Also, he tried to date rape me, which is totally unromantic.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Jeff
Girl #1: Actually, no. She ate a bug once we got to Lake Michigan — wind blew it right down her throat.
Girl #2: Oh, no! But bugs have lots of protein, so that’s good.
Girl #1: They say that about semen, too, though, so I don’t know how much of a comfort that really is.
–Astor Pl
Overheard by: Michelle
