Guy #1: Dude, why are you texting my girlfriend?
Guy #2: She texted me.
Guy #1: I am going to call the whore right now.
–Lincoln Park, 9th Avenue
Overheard by: Mike DeVito
Guy #1: Dude, why are you texting my girlfriend?
Guy #2: She texted me.
Guy #1: I am going to call the whore right now.
–Lincoln Park, 9th Avenue
Overheard by: Mike DeVito
Yuppie man #1: Hey, John is going to be in town tomorrow night, we’re all going to go out
Yuppie man #2: Oh shit, I can’t go. I’ve got a date tomorrow night.
Yuppie man #1: What? Are you serious? Fuck the date, man.
Yuppie man #2: No, yeah. I know, that’s exactly what I got to do.
–Riviera Cafe and Sports Bar, W. 4th Street
Drunk girl: I need to put on lipstick.
Sober guy: Why?
Drunk girl: Because I have a guy coming to see me…he has hair and is taller than me.
–56th & 9th
Guy #1: You dated her? Didn’t she used to have herpes?
Guy #2: “Used to”? Herpes is the gift that keeps on giving.
Guy #3: Herpes is the poor man’s AIDS.
–Brother Jimmy’s, 2nd Avenue
