Queer: What’s missionary?
Chick: Like regular.
–Fordham University, Rose Hill
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Queer: What’s missionary?
Chick: Like regular.
–Fordham University, Rose Hill
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Drunk chick: We are in the business together, so you give me your project and I’ll give you a fuck.
Guy: A fuck?
Drunk chick: Yeah, ’cause I love my job that much…I’m like, 130%…no, wait…140% into my work.
Guy: Really?
Drunk chick: Dude, I’m all about the art.
–Employees Only, Hudson Street
Crazy lady: Yo! Uh…man!
Hot dog guy: Yes?
Crazy lady: Why aren’t you serving me?
Hot dog guy: I just placed your order, ma’am.
Crazy lady: Well I used to work in immigration, so you best be doing that shit quick like right? Shit, I was immigration, okay? I know people, all right?
Hot dog guy: Like who?
Queer: Kenneth Cole?
Crazy lady: No! I know Diedre. Now don’t be playing these crazy mindgames with me! I’m prepared. I have a gun.
Hot dog guy: That’s very nice. That’ll be 5.98 total, ma’am.
Crazy lady: Fuck you. I’m gone now. You can’t see me!
Queer: Faggot, just go away.
–Papaya King, 86th & 3rd
Overheard by: Ben Bleiberg
Girl #1: Look at the clerk…You know what they say about Chinese
clerks…
Girl #2: Shh, Jord, let’s not be racist in public.
–Blockbuster, 56th & 1st
Girl: Do you ever think about us? Like, how many more of us there are than of you?
Professor guy: Of course. That’s why I always pack heat.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Jeff
Crazy guy: Only God lives forever! You do not understand!
Drunk girl: Sir, would you like a balloon?
Crazy guy: Those balloons are beautiful. You keep them…Only God lives forever! You white people do not understand!
–N train
Overheard by: Lee
Girl: We had this huge fight. It was awful. All the screaming and stuff and public.
Guy: Really? In the street and stuff?
Girl: Yeah. It’s so embarassing.
Guy: Wow. You’ll probably end up on that Overheard site.
–Madison Square Garden
Overheard by: Waiting in Line
Guy: So why don’t you give it to a cause you believe in? What are you really into?
Girl: Chillin’ hard.
Guy: Okay, so why don’t you use it for studio time and then give the rest to a charity?
Girl: Well, I just figure when I get old and have schizophrenia and multiple sclerosis and Alzheimer’s I can like afford to send myself to a really nice crazy hospital, you know?
Girl: Definitely.
–A train
Chick #1: Look, this one lights up and oh, there’s a bunny on the
end.
Chick #2: In case the orgasm wasn’t enough?
–Toys in Babeland, Mercer Street
Hobo #1: Who’s gonna win? Who’s gonna win?
Hobo #2: I’ll tell you who’s gonna win. The Seattle Steelers.
–125th & Lexington
Overheard by: Mel
