Dad: I may not be able to drive you to the sleepover at Joey’s father’s house on Friday. It’s in the opposite direction and there won’t be time. What we maybe can do is drop you off there Saturday morning. And we can have pizza ourselves, Friday night, instead. Would that work?
Little boy: It’s a distinct possibility…
–R train
Little boy: Mom, is South America a continent?
Mom: Well, it’s…there’s North America and South America.
Little boy: Yeah, is South America a continent?
Mom: Uh, no. No, it’s not a continent, it’s…Um…
–St. Marks Place
Little girl: Do you have HBO DIRECTV?
Little boy: I don’t know.
Little girl: If you have HBO, you do. My favorite movie is on there: Titanic. It’s about a girl who loves a boy and they’re all frozen at the end.
Little boy: Who gets slapped?
–F train
Overheard by: stephanie k
Little boy #1: Do you live on the Upper West Side?
Little boy #2: Well, technically yes and technically no.
Little boy #1: Okay, see you tomorrow.
–85th & Amsterdam
Little boy: Huge ass.
Woman: What?
Little boy: Huge ass!
–79th Street 1 station
Little boy: Mommy, you should try Black Swan.
Mom: Why don’t you be quiet for a little bit?
–PJ Liquor Warehouse, 207th & Broadway
Overheard by: Andy Hobin
Man: But what I still don’t understand is how some people don’t enjoy getting drunk?
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: kt
Tween girl: I lost my cell phone twice and then got a new one. And I lost my GameBoy. And got a new one.
Tween boy: Do you know how much that cost?
Tween girl: Yeah, well, I’m crazy rich.
Tween boy: How many jackets you got?
Tween girl: Fifteen.
–M104 bus
Overheard by: Fatty McFingers
Teen girl #1: So I gave her her piece.
Teen girl #2: You gave her herpes?
Teen boy #1: No, she gave her her piece.
Teen girl #1: Of chocolate.
Teen girl #2: Ha, ha, ha! “Gave her herpes.” Her piece.
Teen boy #1: Herpes chocolate!
Teen girl #2: Knock, knock.
Teen boy #1: Who’s there?
Teen girl #2: Herpes.
Teen boy #1: Herpes who?
Teen girl #2: Her piece of chocolate!…Hey, Milton! Knock, knock!
Teen boy #2: Who’s there?
Teen girl #2: Herpes!…Milton, you have to say, “herpes who?”!
Teen boy #2: No.
Teen girl #2: You suck, Milton!
Teen girl #1: No, you suck.
Old woman: That’s true.
–1 train
Mom: If you don’t stop acting up I’m going to push you back into my tummy.
Little girl: No you can’t.
Mom: And why not? You came out of me, so I can certainly shove you back in.
Little girl: Because if you do, I’ll start screaming and call the cops on you.
–Daffy’s, Atlantic Center
Overheard by: Need a Belt
