Son: Mom, you need your eyebrows waxed!
Mother: Daniel, you’re not supposed to say that!
Son, whining: But you need your eyebrows waxed… You need your eyebrows waxed, you need your eyebrows waxed, you need your eyebrows waxed!
–4 train
Son: Mom, you need your eyebrows waxed!
Mother: Daniel, you’re not supposed to say that!
Son, whining: But you need your eyebrows waxed… You need your eyebrows waxed, you need your eyebrows waxed, you need your eyebrows waxed!
–4 train
Little boy #1: So, yeah — the human race is pretty much the root of all evil.
Little boy #2: But you’re a human. It’s like you’re insulting yourself.
Little boy #1: Nuh-uh. I’m an android, remember?
–Central Park
Overheard by: Toastuh
Dad: How was school today, buddy?
Three-year-old: Good… But my fucking truck broke.
–86th St & Central Park West
Little white boy: Trick or treat?
Asian employee: Here you go.
Little white boy: Thank you, Chinese! Thank you, Chinese!
–Saint Alps Teahouse
Young boy: Mommy, can we get a Christmas tree now?
Mom: No, honey, we don’t need a tree. We celebrate Hanukkah in our home.
–7th Ave, Park Slope
Little girl, looking at teen with glasses: Why do you wear glasses?
Little boy: Because she farts too much!
–Austin St, Forest Hills
10-year-old girl: Mommy, when I grow up, do you still have to follow me everywhere?
Mom: No.
10-year-old girl: Yesss!
–M101 bus
Overheard by: FRAIS
Little kid, refusing to eat soup: I already ate a chicken patty this morning!
Mother: Shhh. Do you see anyone else in this place yelling?
Little kid: You’re making me yell!
Grandmother: Eat the soup.
Little kid: Stop making me yell!
–Panera Bread
Overheard by: happened to be working on my laptop
Dad: What are you going to do if a boy tries to kiss you?
Little girl: Bop him on the head.
Dad: That’s right — bop him on the head with a stick.
–1 train
Overheard by: Frank Kelly
