Barbers and hairdressers

Haha! You Said “Wednesday One-Liners”!

Professor: So, the probability you’re dealing with a straight is determined by what comes out the back end here.

–Statistics lecture, Columbia University

Overheard by: Chuckles

Blonde hairstylist to male customer: Men are easy. I could do 15 men a day.

–Upscale hair salon

NYU professor about expertise involved in determining chicken gender: When was the last time you turned over a chick?

–NYU

Biology professor: Homo erectus? Homosapiens? I don’t know… So many homos.

–Wagner College

Overheard by: Catherine

Prim older lady: You guys could eat out. Also, you could go out for dinner… Yes, I’m twelve.

–Relish, Williamsburg

Overheard by: Ursula and Winifred

I Just Like Getting On My Knees Five Times A Day

Hairdresser #1: So, you’re a practicing Muslim?
Hairdresser #2: Yep.
Hairdresser #1: So, do Muslims pray to God, or Mohammed, or both?
Hairdresser #2: I don’t really get into the details.

–East 19th St & Ave R, Brooklyn

Overheard by: brooklyn blonde

Headline by: ilemanzer

Runners-Up:

· “I pray to Allah Updo and Crewcut Christ” – katcob

· “I’m just into the hating Jews part.” – DaveO

· “I’m more about the accessories” – Ty

· “Islam is in-er than Thai ladyboys this season.” – eyp

· “Neither does the President.” – Becca


Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Plus, He Says He’ll Die for My Sins

Hairdresser: So, I’m dating this carpenter…
Client: Oooh, is he cute?
Hairdresser: It isn’t so much that he’s ‘cute’ as ‘willing to redo my basement if I go out with him.’

–Amsterdam & W 85th

Overheard by: umpazumparoo

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