Dude: Did you hear the queen’s in town?
Chick: Our town?
Dude: Not necessarily.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: McFreaky
Dude: Did you hear the queen’s in town?
Chick: Our town?
Dude: Not necessarily.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: McFreaky
MTA announcement: Due to an earlier incident, service on the number one line is running slowly. Please be patient.
Girl on stairs: Please be patient… What do they mean?
–59th St station
Overheard by: Sibyl
Customer: I’d like to return this shirt. It fits me just right, but the tag says ‘Large,’ and I don’t wear a size Large.
Returns person: Okay, no problem.
–H&M, 34th & 7th
Overheard by: Andrea Reese
Lady to friend about Magic Johnson AIDS ad: Look at Magic Johnson. Why’s he always look so happy? He’s got AIDS!
Friend: He don’t got AIDS anymore — that’s why he’s happy.
–125th & 5th
Overheard by: tiffanykapri
Passerby #1: I hate this fucking college they got over here.
Passerby #2: Yeah, books and shit.
–115th & Broadway
Buff dude: It’s, like, science fiction, man! I could summon a fireball in my hand right now! It’s fuckin’ science fiction!
Friend: Yeah… You might wanna start smaller.
–Shea Stadium
Overheard by: verbena
Guy: You know — it’s Dow Jones and NASDAQ.
Girl: Who are they? Those guys that died?
–14th & Park Ave South
Chick: I liked it. It wasn’t like, ‘Aw, too bad, it’s the Holocaust.’ It was more like, ‘Yeah! The Holocaust!’
Friend: Plus, it didn’t make me feel guilty about thinking Nazis are hot.
–AMC Theatres
Overheard by: Kelly
Man, about others yelling in street: Yo! This is just like reality TV, man!
Passerby: You mean reality is?
Man: Uh…
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: Maggie
Girl #1, studying for math exam: I still don’t get it.
Girl #2: What I’m saying is that this statement has nothing to do with a croissant coming out of my ass.
Girl #1: Oh, okay.
Girl #2: Yeah, that’s the only way I can remember how to do the problem.
–Marymount Manhattan College
