Manhattan

It’s Gonna Be One Awkward Morning

Lady #1: Look at me. I’m taking Percocet and drinking red wine.
Lady #2: I think they call that a Napa Valley speedball.

–McCoy’s Bar, 9th Avenue

Overheard by: Katrina Olson

Posted on March 16, 2006
Bars & Clubs, Drinking & Drunk People, Drugs, History & Geography, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen

Deal or No Deal?

Vendor guy: Yo man, you 420 friendly? Here, here; here’s my card. Call me up.
Girl: Uh, yeah sure. Can I get my change?
Vendor guy: Oh, right, right. Sure.
Dude: Hey man, can I get $4 worth of weed?
Vendor guy: What? Man. What?
Dude: $4 of weed, man.
Vendor guy: What are you talking about, man? I don’t sell weed. What kind of man do you take me for? Buy $4 of weed. man. I’m offended. Especially in front of this beautiful girl. Asking for weed. Man, what’s yo problem?

–30th & 8th

Overheard by: Justine

Posted on March 16, 2006
Drugs, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Smokers & Smoking, Vendors & Street Performers

Would She Rather Catch Toes?

Girl #1: Whatever, you never even let me put my feet on the furniture when I stay with you.
Girl #2: That is because your feet were covered with warts!
Girl #1: Warts that I caught from the Mother Wart that was on your foot!

–Central Park

Posted on March 16, 2006
Anger Management, Central Park, Health and Hygiene, Manhattan

He Had That Barbie Look

Dude #1: We were discussing the Holocaust in my class, and there was this really hot guy in it, and all I could think about was fucking him.
Dude #2: Fucking a guy in the Holocaust? Ew.

–1st Avenue & 12th Street

Posted on March 16, 2006
History & Geography, Manhattan, Queers, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Stupidity, Union Square and East Village

What’s in a Name, Wednesday One-liners?

Receptionist lady: Don’t you be sayin’ my whole name; I’m on America’s Most Wanted!

–NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, West 168th Street

Overheard by: supermerm

Posted on March 15, 2006
Asians, Bronx Science, Drinking & Drunk People, Drugs, Etiquette, Fast Times at New York High, Ghetto Chicks, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Hipsters, Hospitals, Lower East Side, Manhattan, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Staten Island, Teens, The Bronx, The Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport

Wednesday One-liners Sport Beef Curtains

Guy: That’s why people like me: for my vagina-cleansing properties.

–Times Square station

Overheard by: Thiess

Posted on March 15, 2006
Body Parts, Brooklyn, Eating Out, Elevators, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Kink, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, On the Subway, One-liners, Queers, Sex, Sex & Relationships, Suits, Times Square, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

Your Prescription is Wednesday One-liners

Dowager: Today was the first day I took a Celebrex since the pogo stick thing.

–Park & 60th

Overheard by: Frank Laser

Posted on March 15, 2006
Body Parts, College, Drugs, Health and Hygiene, Hipsters, Hospitals, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, National Security, NYU, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Soho, Teens, The Village, Upper East Side, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

Wednesday One-liners Found “The One”

Suit on cell: It’s sex: somebody’s always taking advantage of someone else…Oh shit, this girl just gave me a look. That’s gonna be on Overheard tomorrow, I just know it.

–45th & Lexington

Overheard by: No, not her