Manhattan

Guy: We thought Cecile got the Burberry print ad.
Girl: Yeah, if she got it I was going to manage her career.
Guy: It was up between her and another dog, but I guess she lost.

–Bread Tribeca, Church Street

Overheard by: Jaysen Medhurst

Office thug #1: Yo, Windows is, like, mad-retarded!
Office thug #2: Say what?
Office thug #1: I said Windows is bullshit, man.
Office thug #2: Man, I been telling you that shit for years. My G5 is way better than whatever computer you got.
Office thug #1: Nigga, my laptop has AIDS!

–52nd St & Madison

Queer: Where does Dusty work?
Girl: At a church by Spring Street.
Queer: What does he do?
Girl: He’s an administrative assistant.
Queer: An administrative assistant to God?

–Union Square

Girl: … so dogs were getting electrocuted and they kept telling people to put boots on their dogs–
Guy: What is with these New Yorkers and their dogs? If you want a creature that badly, have a child!
Girl: You are an idiot.

–110th & Amsterdam

Hobo: Where the fuck is Park Avenue? What is going on? What the fuck? Where the fuck is Park Avenue?
Girl: If you just take a right at the next street and keep going, you’ll hit it.
Hobo: I don’t fucking care! If I had a gun I’d fucking shoot you! Pow!

–87th & 2nd

Little girl: What’s that, mommy?
She points to double-decker site-seeing tourist bus.
Mom: That’s what the tourists use to look at us.

–46 & 8th

An unofficial memorial is covered with flowers, candles, cards and candy.

Drunk girl #1: Hey, who wants a Blow Pop?
Drunk guy: Um…I dunno.
Drunk girl #2: Don’t. It’s bad luck to take candy from the dead.
Drunk girl #1: …Yeah, I guess you’re right.

–3rd between A & B

Overheard by: The Vouk

Girl: Don’t die while I’m gone, okay?
Guy: Why not?

–66th & Columbus

Drunk girl #1 coughs.
Drunk girl #2: If you vomit, I swear to God this friendship is over.

–Bleecker St

Overheard by: kellianne

Girl: Yeah, so I thought my professor was just affected, but today
she admitted she’s Canadian.

–116th & Broadway