Big girl: Oh my goddd! Your doggy is soo adorable — I just want to eat him!
Dog owner: Umm — Thanks, I guess. [To her friend] Is that the most endearing thing she could come up with?
–37th & 7th
Overheard by: Russ
Big girl: Oh my goddd! Your doggy is soo adorable — I just want to eat him!
Dog owner: Umm — Thanks, I guess. [To her friend] Is that the most endearing thing she could come up with?
–37th & 7th
Overheard by: Russ
Woman sitting on bench with small dog on lap: You know that no matter what you do, I will always love you, right?
–1st & 87th
Deli guy: You can’t have that dog in here.
Lady: But he’s a service dog!
Deli guy: What? We’ll get a ticket if you have a dog in here.
Lady: He’s a service dog. He’s just like a seeing eye dog.
Deli guy: What is he, a chihuahua? A poodle? He’s not a seeing eye dog.
Lady: He’s a Pomeranian! And he’s a service dog! He even has a little vest, do you need me to put him in his little vest?
Deli guy: He look like a rat with a wig on.
Lady: He’s a service dog! You can’t make me leave! He’s just like a seeing eye dog!
Deli guy: But you’re not blind!
Lady: I could sue you if you make me leave! I’ll put him in his little vest, then you’ll see!
–Bagel Mill, 88th & Lex
Overheard by: Loretta P.
Girl #1: Sometimes I wanna kill your cat.
Girl #2: But I thought you hated dogs.
Girl #1: I do, but your cat always looks at me like it wants to hump my leg.
–100th & Broadway
Overheard by: Amanda Fox
Weiner dog: Woof woof.
Hobo: That isn’t fucking funny! Piece of shit, fucking hors d’oeuvres on wheels!
–Lex between 86 & 87
Boy #1: That bitch kind of looks like her dog.
Boy #2: Yeah, but she’s busted.
Boy #1: Word, I’d definitely pipe the dog before I piped her.
Boy #2: What the fuck?
–Strawberry Fields, Central Park
Overheard by: sarahh
Guy #1: Man, what kind of dog is that?
Guy #2: I don’t know, but it shits a lot.
–125th & Broadway
Overheard by: LoJo
Guy #1: Hey, watch it! Jerk!
Guy #2: Get a bigger dog, asshole!
Guy #1: Be a smaller person!
–Bleecker & Perry
Overheard by: Zell
Crazy lady: Does anyone know how to get to the fucking G train? I need to get to a fucking job interview at 6!
Man #1: I swear it’s really not like this all the time.
Woman: What kind of job is she going for?
Man #2: I hope it’s not customer service.
Man #3: Hey baby, just follow me. I’m getting on the G right now.
Crazy lady: Go suck a dead dog’s dick.
Man #3: So what’s that taste like?
Crazy lady: A dead dog’s dick.
–4 train
Chick #1: Oh my god, that girl just opened her mouth so wide she could swallow the world.
Chick #2: Seriously, I think she just swallowed me. And while I was in there, there were three children with me…and a lhasa apso.
–44th & 2nd