He’s a Service Rat

Deli guy: You can’t have that dog in here.

Lady: But he’s a service dog!

Deli guy: What? We’ll get a ticket if you have a dog in here.

Lady: He’s a service dog. He’s just like a seeing eye dog.

Deli guy: What is he, a chihuahua? A poodle? He’s not a seeing eye dog.

Lady: He’s a Pomeranian! And he’s a service dog! He even has a little vest, do you need me to put him in his little vest?

Deli guy: He look like a rat with a wig on.

Lady: He’s a service dog! You can’t make me leave! He’s just like a seeing eye dog!

Deli guy: But you’re not blind!

Lady: I could sue you if you make me leave! I’ll put him in his little vest, then you’ll see!

–Bagel Mill, 88th & Lex

Overheard by: Loretta P.

Posted on May 4, 2006
Man's Best Friend, Upper East Side, We Love Our Pets

So Do You Come to Petco Often?

Boy #1: That bitch kind of looks like her dog.
Boy #2: Yeah, but she’s busted.
Boy #1: Word, I’d definitely pipe the dog before I piped her.
Boy #2: What the fuck?

–Strawberry Fields, Central Park

Overheard by: sarahh

Posted on April 30, 2006
Central Park, Kink, Man's Best Friend, Manhattan, We Love Our Pets

Only an Idiot Expects a Shih Tzu Headline

Guy #1: Man, what kind of dog is that?
Guy #2: I don’t know, but it shits a lot.

–125th & Broadway

Overheard by: LoJo

Posted on April 17, 2006
Harlem & Morningside Heights, Man's Best Friend, Manhattan, Poop, We Love Our Pets

Pets Are for the Petty

Guy #1: Hey, watch it! Jerk!
Guy #2: Get a bigger dog, asshole!
Guy #1: Be a smaller person!

–Bleecker & Perry

Overheard by: Zell

Posted on April 16, 2006
Anger Management, Man's Best Friend, Manhattan, The Village, We Love Our Pets

Correct Answer: Sommelier

Crazy lady: Does anyone know how to get to the fucking G train? I need to get to a fucking job interview at 6!
Man #1: I swear it’s really not like this all the time.
Woman: What kind of job is she going for?
Man #2: I hope it’s not customer service.

Man #3: Hey baby, just follow me. I’m getting on the G right now.
Crazy lady: Go suck a dead dog’s dick.
Man #3: So what’s that taste like?
Crazy lady: A dead dog’s dick.

–4 train

Posted on April 14, 2006
Jobs & Careers, Man's Best Friend, On the Subway, We Love Our Pets

Finally, Someone Defends the Black Guy

Crazy dude: Daffy Duck is my favorite character, but Walt Disney was an anti-Semite and I’m a Jew. I used to watch cartoons but someone stole my television.
Dude #2: Daffy Duck stole your television?
Crazy dude: No. Daffy Duck is my best friend.

–F train

Overheard by: Gunner

Posted on April 10, 2006
Animals & Nature, Friendship, Jews, Multiculturalism, Overheard Style, On the Subway, Stupidity, TV, Violence, We Love Our Pets

None of That Drag Queen Lassie Crap

Man: Those are some fine-lookin’ sweaters!
Old lady: Do you like them? I made them, you know.
Man: You made those?
Old lady: I did.
Man: Do you think you could make one for him?
Old lady: I would be delighted!
Man: But, you know…I mean…like, for a boy chihuahua.

–11th & B

Overheard by: Stephanie Matthew-Diaz

Girl #1: What? What are you talking about? I’m talking about the Johnny Cash song, A Boy Named Sue!
Girl #2: And I’m talking about my dog being a cross-dresser.

–27th & 7th