Teen girl to mom: Here, this is what you need [points to Sex for Dummies book].

–Barnes & Noble, Union Square

Girl: I read all of the gossip magazines, but I should probably read the Wall Street Times.

–Chelsea Piers

Bimbette: Like, why would you stay home and read when there’s so much other stuffs to do?

–89th & 3rd

Overheard by: Ben A

Chick: Do you have Dante’s Inferno? I don’t know the author…

–Strand Bookstore

Dude on cell: Yeah, I’m just buying a book ’cause I got bored. Then I’m going back to finish my Bloody Mary.

–Burgen & Flatbush

Woman: He read a book on fisting, and now he wants to share it with his class.

–L train

Dude: They should have made Beowulf into a book — they would have made a lot more money.

–34th & 8th

Overheard by: LetheaBu

Girl: It used to be the only reason I liked Anna Quindlen was ’cause she was blind. Now it’s like, ‘Dude, she can read?!’

–Barnard College

NYU bimbette to studious friend: Your problem is that you read for all your classes. Sobriety and scholarly. Those are your problems.

–Starbucks, W 4th St

Overheard by: wine girl

Nine-year-old girl: I forgot my book, and I was supposed to do a report on it! Now what am I going to do?! I’m so senile.

–JFK

Overheard by: mr itchie

Book-hawking hobo: … And this is my new book, ‘If You Don’t Beat Your Children, They’ll End Up Like Me’!

–6 train

Overheard by: Zarek