Pilot over loudspeaker (riffing on harmonica): This is your captain speaking, (harmonica riff) Welcome aboard, (harmonica riff) Please fasten your seat belts. (harmonica riff) Or we won't be able to leave beautiful Atlanta, Georgia.
(does long, jazzy harmonica riff. Passengers applaud)
Pilot (in Elvis voice): Thank you very much.
American Airlines Flight
Atlanta, Georgia
Man: My nipples are exploding with excitement!
Back Bay Station
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Me too
Mid-twenties guy leaving voice mail: Hey baby, just calling to say hi. How are your boobs?
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/06/just-fine-thanks-and-yours.html
Overheard by: brickskeller
Professionally dressed Asian girl (in a low voice): I can’t believe you showed that girl your pubes, man!
Short, pudgy Asian guy (in a low indignant voice): Well *I* can’t believe you showed her your innie nipple!
Elevator, Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Teen girl: Hey! This lip gloss matches my nipples! And my phone.
Galleria Mall
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Jo
Female student #1: I think Picasso painted them as nudes to liberate women; to show that they're human beings.
Female student #2: I think he just liked tits.
French Class
UMass, Amherst
Guy to girlfriend: I like when we’re both using our laptops and I lick your nipple and it shocks me, like licking a nine-volt battery.
Palo Alto, California
Teen gay guy: Hey, do you ever color your nipples?
Teen girl: Huh?
Teen gay guy: When you get bored you, don't take a Sharpie and color your nipples? (pulls up shirt and points) See, this one's pink and this one's blue.
Teen girl: Um…no, I don't.
Oregon
Overheard by: nyssa
Girl, watching painting: That's a girl, she's got those things. (points to nipples)
Boy: It's a boy! Grown-up boys have those, too. I've seen them.
Girl: It's a girl!
Boy: No, boys have them too; they just don't do as much. The girls' milk, the boys' don't.
Art Gallery
Portland, Oregon
Grad student on her Gender History peer review: I don’t feel the need to keep the nipple section.
University of Tulsa
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Andrea
