Father to screaming toddler: Y’know, some people ran 26 miles today, and I’m only asking you to walk a block!
–Times Square
Father to screaming toddler: Y’know, some people ran 26 miles today, and I’m only asking you to walk a block!
–Times Square
Drunk woman in long fur coat: Oh, you have to be fucking kidding me! I gotta pee!
Tourist: Yeah, we’ve been waiting for a while. [Nods in direction of unattended mop soaking in bucket, and laughs] I mean, you could always use that thing, I guess.
Drunk woman: Okay, alright — just tell me if anyone is coming! [Hikes up coat and begins to pee in bucket.]Tourist: Jesus Christ! I’ve been here one day, and I’m responsible for encouraging public urination.
–Line for restroom, McDonald’s, Times Square
Overheard by: wish i’d thought of that
Boy looking at action figures in window: Which of these do you like best?
Girl: I’m not sure… Definitely not George Bush.
Boy, pointing to Albert Einstein: I don’t like him. He invented the atomic bomb and killed loads of people.
–Times Square
Angry kid: Man, I’m tired of seeing that naked white fag with the guitar all the time.
Friend: Your dad?
Angry kid: No, you dumb fuck! That freak over there — he’s in postcards and shit. He’s like a celebrity, kinda.
Friend: I think that’s your dad…
Angry kid: Fuck you, ho.
–TKTS station, Times Square
Tourist #1: This is the entrance, that’s the exit! You need to wait your turn in line to get out the right way.
Tourist #2, plowing through gate: Pshhh. Tourists!
–Times Square station
Overheard by: Ava
Girl counting her money: Excuse me, ma’am — are there four quarters in a dollar?
Older lady: Yes, my dear.
Girl: Oh, great! Thanks!
–Times Square station
Patron: Are any of these soups vegetarian?
Cook: Yeah, the chicken noodle is.
–Café, Times Square
Overheard by: britmazing
Drunk girl: It’s like we’re the same person!
Suit: Except you’re four inches shorter, thirty pounds heavier, and a dumbass!
–Times Square
Girl #1: Wait… You’re not a virgin?
Girl #2: Nope. I had sex once. Well, nine times.
–McDonald’s, Times Square
Middle-aged woman: What’s with the ‘Make cupcakes, not war’ shirt?
30-something guy: I have a friend who is an activist.
Middle-aged woman: Yikes, that’s scary.
30-something guy: I hear you. Democracy works so much better when people don’t get involved.
–Times Square
