HS girl #1: I read five books a week and my parents get mad at me because it costs them a lot of money.
HS girl #2: I read like five books a week too, but I get mine from the library.
HS girl #1: Oh, that’s ghetto.
–Times Square
Fat Black guy: They ain’t got nuthin’ in here for someone from the ghetto!
–Starbucks, Astor Place Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: Dan Avery
Chick on cell: …It was the worst. First of all, he have a big dick. And to make things worse, he did not know how to fuck…I mean, come on, what the hell is that all about?…Uh huh, yeah, you are probably right…and another thing he couldn’t fit…I guess my pussy was too small or something…yeah, uh huh, I don’t think so. It’s not worth the trouble. Would you go back?…Exactly.
–Time Square
Overheard by: Jada
Hobo: She’s fine, I’d fuck her…her too. And that one. And….ooh, not her, you can have that one.
–Madison Square Park
Old hobo: Who the fuck said black people are dangerous? The next person I hear say that I am throwing in the next dumpster!
–40th & 8th
Hobo: People, if you do not have a useable skill and/or a good pussy, you do not get that train ticket home!
–Times Square
Girl #1: Damn, what’s this fucking smell?
Girl #2: It’s your mouth next to your nose.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Leticia
Paparazzo: So you two are really pretty, have you ever done any modeling?
Dutch girl #1: Ha ha ha, not me, maybe her.
Dutch girl #2: No, I am studying history at home.
Paparazzo: You really should consider it, there is great money in it and I would love to help you get started.
Dutch girl #2: Sounds interesting…what type of modeling?
Paparazzo: Well, nude sells the best. We can go over to my place and discuss it.
Dutch girl #1: Great!
Dutch girl #2: Maybe you can take some of us together.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Stephanie Nally
Tourist fratboy #1: It said “Free Stress Test.”
Tourist fratboy #2: What’s Dianetics, anyway?
–Times Square
Overheard by: KN
Big booty girl #1: Bubble Boy. I love that movie.
Big booty girl #2: Yeah me, too.
Big booty girl #1: No, I really love that movie.
Big booty girl #2: Yeah, it’s funny.
Big booty girl #1: That used to be my ex-boyfriend and me’s movie…but that’s not why I love it.
–Times Square
Girl: …so I told him to suck his own dick if he thinks he can do it any better.
–G train
Overheard by: Ocera
Little boy: Mommy, mommy, do you have a penis?
–E train
Overheard by: Ting
JHS kid: …so I said, “He’s gonna make you stay after class and he’s gonna pull down your fucking pants and shove his fucking cock up your ass!”
–Times Square shuttle
Overheard by: Lizzy
Hobo: …but don’t worry; us Republicans know what you’re up to!
–Sullivan & W. 3rd
Woman on cell: Uh huh…yeah…right…uh huh…uh huh…the one you thought was underwear…uh huh…right…
–Lincoln Center
Girl on cell: I am so not dressed for a strip club!
–Times Square
Tourist: You can tell it’s raining because everybody here has umbrellas.
–Times Square station
Overheard by: Joel Guilbert
Nut: I have powers, she has powers, and she knows that I have powers!
–Astor Place
