Professor: I mean, what’s with getting to know them? What about: You see someone, you don’t even talk, you penetrate them.
UCLA
Los Angeles, CA
Professor: I mean, what’s with getting to know them? What about: You see someone, you don’t even talk, you penetrate them.
UCLA
Los Angeles, CA
Girl to guys talking about their Easter candy: You know, I just want to point out that you’re both 23 and still getting Easter candy from your parents.
Guy #1: Hey, it’s not like I asked for it!
Guy #2: And besides, it’s not from my mom. It’s from the bunny.
PETCO Park
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Danette
Marine #1: So, how was it?
Marine #2: Crazy. She wanted me to take a shit in her pussy. That’s fucking weird, man.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Soundbite Lover
Suit on cell: I don’t know much about this party he’s throwing, other than he got me a pregnant stripper.
Del Monte Shopping Center
Monterey, California
Overheard by: Amy
Woman screaming into phone: You need to chill the fuck out!
San Francisco, California
Guy #1: I would sacrifice myself to save the rest of the world. Wouldn't you?
Guy #2: Naw, man. Fuck the world.
Chino, California
Little old lady: I’m not a Pina Colada type. Give me a Coors Light and a nice doobie and I’m good.
Women’s Gym
Studio City, California
Overheard by: urzzz
Female student: I feel like I have a really tough skin, because I was always teased by my dad from the moment I was born.
Male student (in very serious, philosophical tone): Scorn was your breast milk.
University of Southern California
Overheard by: Got milk?
Hippie guy: Did you know he built a whole, like, bum encampment out of logs? Two houses, a refrigerator… Well, there was no electricity but he had a refrigerator out there… He even had a guest bed. And it was all clean, with a bible laying on the bed… He took being a bum to a whole new level.
Humboldt State University
Arcata, California
Overheard by: Jenn
Young woman on cell: I kiss my grandpa on the mouth, have I made out with him?
Palo Alto, California
