Angry girl: What do you mean you didn’t fuck up?
Boyfriend: I didn’t fuck up!
Angry girl: You got a stripper pregnant! You fucked up!
–Sandwich shop, Bleecker
Overheard by: Catie
Angry girl: What do you mean you didn’t fuck up?
Boyfriend: I didn’t fuck up!
Angry girl: You got a stripper pregnant! You fucked up!
–Sandwich shop, Bleecker
Overheard by: Catie
Girl maker-outer, pulling away: Why you so ugly?
Guy maker-outer: Don’t you worry ’bout that, baby. [They continue making out.]
–F train
Overheard by: steph
Tall blonde: I just don’t think I’d be comfortable on a nude beach.
Boyfriend: I would be.
–Union Square West
Overheard by: Michelle
Middle-aged man: Sorry, I thought you’d like it.
Middle-aged woman: Well, it hurt.
–Madison Ave
Overheard by: turbobread
Passionate man: You have to be able to voice your own opinion! Stand up for yourself! You’re the CFO of a four billion dollar company — you have to be able to make these kinds of decisions!
Lady with him, totally baffled: I was just so overwhelmed — I’ve never seen so many different kinds of rice pudding…!
–Outside Rice to Riches, Spring St
Overheard by: leah
Guy: So, if I told you that your eyes reminded me of the color of shit, would you be offended?
Over-sensitive girl: Yeah…
Guy: But your eyes are blue!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Caesar22
Guy: I’m exhausted as fuck.
Chick: Good for you.
Guy: Shut up, you twunt.
Chick: Did you just try to combine ‘twat’ and ‘cunt’?
Guy: Some of my friends created it.
Chick: No wonder it’s retarded. It completely takes away from both insults, which are perfectly functional and to the point by themselves.
Guy: You’re such a little bitch.
–181st & Ft. Washington
Overheard by: LSB
Boyfriend, looking at body pillow: Aw, man! I should totally get this!
Girlfriend: Why would you get that? We’re moving in together in like a year. We’ll be sharing a bed with each other.
Boyfriend: Yeah, but I can do things to this pillow that I can’t do to you!
–Target, Queens Center Mall
Chick: You just don’t get me sometimes!
Guy: Like how?
Chick: I don’t like it when you call me a fat pig!
–1 train
Overheard by: Csmith
Drunk boyfriend at party: Babe, get me some chicken on a stick.
Annoyed girlfriend: Get it yourself.
Drunk boyfriend: But I might make a mess and embarrass you…
Annoyed girlfriend: I don’t care anymore.
Girl passerby, handing him chicken on a stick: Here, have some chicken!
Annoyed girlfriend: Maybe you should date her.
Male passerby: Yeah, she seems like a keeper.
–Gibson Studios, W 54th, between 9th & 10th
