Tourist hubby to wifey who jumped up from taking a seat: What happened?
Tourist woman, disgusted: I just saw some dirt!
–4 train
Tourist hubby to wifey who jumped up from taking a seat: What happened?
Tourist woman, disgusted: I just saw some dirt!
–4 train
Blonde: What? I can’t say ‘I want to fuck my Korean boyfriend’ out loud in here?
Embarrassed Asian guy: Please not here. Keep your voice down. We’ll talk about it when we get home.
Blonde: What’s a girl gotta do to get some kimchi around here? I’m dying. You’ve got to give up the goods more.
–Duane Reade
Angry girl: What do you mean you didn’t fuck up?
Boyfriend: I didn’t fuck up!
Angry girl: You got a stripper pregnant! You fucked up!
–Sandwich shop, Bleecker
Overheard by: Catie
Girl maker-outer, pulling away: Why you so ugly?
Guy maker-outer: Don’t you worry ’bout that, baby. [They continue making out.]
–F train
Overheard by: steph
Tall blonde: I just don’t think I’d be comfortable on a nude beach.
Boyfriend: I would be.
–Union Square West
Overheard by: Michelle
Middle-aged man: Sorry, I thought you’d like it.
Middle-aged woman: Well, it hurt.
–Madison Ave
Overheard by: turbobread
Passionate man: You have to be able to voice your own opinion! Stand up for yourself! You’re the CFO of a four billion dollar company — you have to be able to make these kinds of decisions!
Lady with him, totally baffled: I was just so overwhelmed — I’ve never seen so many different kinds of rice pudding…!
–Outside Rice to Riches, Spring St
Overheard by: leah
Guy: So, if I told you that your eyes reminded me of the color of shit, would you be offended?
Over-sensitive girl: Yeah…
Guy: But your eyes are blue!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Caesar22
Guy: I’m exhausted as fuck.
Chick: Good for you.
Guy: Shut up, you twunt.
Chick: Did you just try to combine ‘twat’ and ‘cunt’?
Guy: Some of my friends created it.
Chick: No wonder it’s retarded. It completely takes away from both insults, which are perfectly functional and to the point by themselves.
Guy: You’re such a little bitch.
–181st & Ft. Washington
Overheard by: LSB
Boyfriend, looking at body pillow: Aw, man! I should totally get this!
Girlfriend: Why would you get that? We’re moving in together in like a year. We’ll be sharing a bed with each other.
Boyfriend: Yeah, but I can do things to this pillow that I can’t do to you!
–Target, Queens Center Mall
