Hipster guy #1: We’ve been working on this kind of Flickr thing for cell phones for, like, a month.
Hipster guy #2: That might be kind of cool…
Hipster guy #1: No, it fuckin’ sucks. Nobody’s gonna use it.
–Chinatown bus
Hipster guy #1: We’ve been working on this kind of Flickr thing for cell phones for, like, a month.
Hipster guy #2: That might be kind of cool…
Hipster guy #1: No, it fuckin’ sucks. Nobody’s gonna use it.
–Chinatown bus
10-year-old girl: Mommy, when I grow up, do you still have to follow me everywhere?
Mom: No.
10-year-old girl: Yesss!
–M101 bus
Overheard by: FRAIS
Teen #1: Once, on the subway, I saw this guy and he was jerking off. Can you believe it?! Jerking off!
Teen #2: Jerking off on the subway?! That’s got to be unhealthy!
–M96 bus
Annoyed bimbette: You cannot go out with him! Like, who will go and pick up random guys with me?
Brunette: I’ll still go out with you.
Annoyed bimbette: No, I know you — you’ll say ‘yes’ when he asks you out. You can’t go out with him. Oh, yeah, wait — he’s younger than you. You can get him pussy-whipped like that. You have to go out with him.
Brunette, defeated: Okay.
–S79 bus
Teen girl #1: You didn’t I know I went out with Hector?
Teen girl #2: Nah.
Teen girl #3: Hector went out with everyone. He kissed all the girls. We called him ‘The Rapist,’ or ‘R. Kelly.’
–Q88 bus
Overheard by: Me
Guy #1: Yo, it’s hot, son!
Guy #2: Yeah, like two dicks rubbin’ together.
–Q6 bus
Overheard by: Who knows what that feels like?
Dude #1: Yeah, he tans all the time by the track. He uses, like, a quarter of a bottle of tanning oil.
Dude #2: Well, there’s a lot of skin cancer.
Chick: I think skin cancer is overrated. Not to be disrespectful, but is it even legitimate?
–Jamaica-bound Q30 bus
Overheard by: Liza
Thug: [Hacking cough.]Old woman: You choking again? You keep it up and I’m gonna have to do the hymen maneuver on you!
Thug: Awww, hell no!
–Bx4 bus
Overheard by: some chick
Teen girl #1: So, last night we were talking, and he still wants to put it in my ass… Like, how could I be with someone who only thinks about shoving his thing up my ass?
Teen girl #2: So what are you gonna do?
Teen girl #1: I don’t know! Help me!
Teen girl #2, puzzled: I thought you love anal sex?
Teen girl #1: Oh, yeah.
–S79 bus
Overheard by: rob l
Sixth grader #1: When I grow up, I’m going to make a movie called The Tallest Midget!
Sixth grader #2: Nigga, you stupid.
–Triboro coach
Overheard by: face
