Chemistry professor: Now, it may seem that nature has gotten it wrong–but like me, nature never gets it wrong.
University of Auckland
New Zealand
Chemistry professor: Now, it may seem that nature has gotten it wrong–but like me, nature never gets it wrong.
University of Auckland
New Zealand
Long-nosed cute blond girl: So you're basically offering to fuck me in the arse?
Drunk guy: Not in the arse per se, but I can't guarantee that I won't get the wrong hole and just go for it.
Long-nosed cute blond girl: You do know we just met five minutes ago?
Drunk guy: What can I say? I work fast.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Nerdy freshman talking about philosophy: Well, it depends on what you consider real. Like is Spiderman real?
Kid sitting with him: Uh…
Nerdy freshman: Think about it! Is he?
U Mass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Philosophy professor: He chose this example because it had sex appeal. It turned people on.
(changes PowerPoint slide to picture of bacterial flagellum)
Male student: Ohhhhh!
Professor: Please don't have an orgasm in my class.
Lycoming College
Williamsport, Pennsylvania
College girl, handing heavy basket to boyfriend: I’m all for feminism, but I don’t like carrying heavy things.
Target
Towson, Maryland
Overheard by: Kay-ren
Office building tenant: Oh, and I just wanted to let you know there was a fire in the dumpster last week. I looked for the security guard in the building, but couldn't find him. I didn't know who else to notify, so I just went home.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/420134135/thats-the-documented-procedure.html
Overheard by: how about 911?
Girl: I honestly think anal sex is just as bad as fucking a guy with a girlfriend.
http://overheardinlakecounty.blogspot.com/2006/07/is-anal-sex-with-guy-who-has.html
Sobbing child: It’s not fair! That’s mine!
Little bully: So what? Don’t cry about it. You’re being so dumb.
Sobbing child: I’m upset! It’s okay for me to cry sometimes!
Preschool
Santa Barbara, California
Professor: Now, if we did eliminate illness and achieved immortality there might be serious religious repercussions. Can anyone think of how this might affect religious beliefs?
Bimbette: Well, like, if Hitler were immortal, he would, like, go to jail for, like, a million years and then, like, chill out for eternity, you know?
Eternal Youth and Immortality Seminar
Lafayette College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: knows that Hitler would still be dead because he SHOT himself
College girl #1: You know how you tell yourself, ‘It’s okay to spend a lot of money on clothes, because then I won’t have enough money to buy food so I’ll be able to fit into my clothes’?
College girl #2: I never tell myself that.
College girl #1: Oh. Well, I do.
Newbury Street boutique
Boston, Massachusetts
