The Difference? An Average of 50 Lbs

High school girl #1: Yeah, Americans have no moral values. The United States hasn’t had good morals since, like, the 17th century.
High school girl #2: Yeah, I know.
High school girl #1: I mean, you could walk down the street naked and no one would say anything. That would never happen in Europe.
High school girl #2: Yeah, but in France women wear tight, revealing clothing, too.
High school girl #1: But in France it’s fashionable. Here it’s just slutty.

–Victory Blvd, Staten Island

Overheard by: The US wasn’t a country in the 17th century…

Posted on December 28, 2021
Fashion, Philosophy, Staten Island, Students

Wednesday Flatliners

Dude on cell: Alright, listen up. If the guy gets up and walks away, he's not dead. If you come back and he's still lying there, he's dead, you follow? So, in that situation you are just going to go through the motions like we discussed.

–23th & 7th

Overheard by: mel

Random man on bicycle to doorman: You never know when you're going to eat a bad mushroom and die.

–87th St & York Ave

Overheard by: Critter

Jersey woman, looking at a case with brains that suffered from major stroke: Oh my gawd… They probably died from that!

–Bodies The Exhibition, South St Seaport

Guy shopping in art supply on a cell: So you're banking on dying young, then?

–Art Store, Williamsburg

Spacey old guy to friends, calmly: I want to murder that guy. (even more calmly) I've got bloodlust in my heart.

–9th St b/w 1st & 2nd

Overheard by: JKW

Woman on cell: You want to be cremated, right? (pause) Well, then what the hell are we going to do with you?

–Park Ave

Posted on September 23, 2021
Age/Aging, All Wednesday One-Liners, Blood & bleeding, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Crazies, Death, Food, Guys, Health and Hygiene, Idiots, Men, More museums, Murder, Old People, On Cell, Philosophy, Questions, Stupidity, Union Square and East Village, Upper East Side, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Weirdness, Williamsburg, Women

…But I Know That an Apple a Day Brings the Doctor to You.

Girl #1: If Rome was built in a day, I can definitely build a website in one day also…
Girl #2: The saying is “Rome wasn't built in a day.”
Girl #1: Are you sure? That kinda ruins my logic.

–NYU

Posted on July 1, 2021
Girls, History & Geography, Internet, NYU, Philosophy, Stupidity, Time

The Answer Is Shitting in the Wind

Man on a park bench #1: Betcha never seen a dandelion turn from yellow to white. Even catch one half-way in between.
Man on a park bench #2: Betcha ain’t never seen no baby pigeons. Ain’t noboby never seen no baby pigeons. See all them big fat ones? Where’s the babies at?

–Central Park

Posted on June 28, 2021
Animals & Nature, Central Park, Manhattan, Philosophy

Wednesday One-Liners You Can Dance to

Dude: He’s the black, blind Motown equivalent of Kenny G.

–113th & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy

Girl, while leaving screening of "I am legend": Okay… I cannot believe the woman did not know Bob Marley! I mean, that had to be the most unrealistic thing in that entire film.

–Fresh Meadows, Queens

Overheard by: hmmm…

Curly-haired chick: Has New Order become an okay kinky sex background band? Am I *old*?

–113th & Broadway

Overheard by: Poogins

Guy, standing next to guy listening to Journey on his iPod: Get away from me! Just get the fuck away from me!

–2 Train

Dumb girl dressed like Scary Spice en route to the concert: Yeah, a lot of people think that the Spice Girls like, reinstated feminism.

–NJ Transit

Yale grad: Eminem has a wonderful sense of meter.

–Court St., Brooklyn

Overheard by: Justin Casement

Queer: We only stayed for 15 minutes, I’m not that into karaoke. And when a coven of lesbians start casting their spells to "My Sharona", I was outta there."

–Chambers & Greenwich

Overheard by: Grand Witch Muffy

Posted on June 23, 2021
All Wednesday One-Liners, Brooklyn, Celebrations/Parties, Colors, Compare/Contrast, Compliments, Default, Disabilities, Ew, Jersey, Gays and Lesbians, Gender issues, Girls, Guys, Idiots, Insults, Kink, Movies, Music, Offers and requests, On the Subway, Philosophy, Queens, Queer guys, Questions, Singing, Street, The Village, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Weirdness

…Or a Trannie in the Present One

Girl #1: Wow, you have no problem talking to those guys at the bar like a guy.
Girl #2: Yeah, I know. I must have been a guy in a past life.

–74th & 1st

Overheard by: Megan C.

Posted on May 13, 2021
Girls, Philosophy, Trannies, Upper East Side

What Is the Net Value Of This Relationship? Show Your Work.

Dorky bookstore guy: Teaching is like the biggest safety net of all.
Cute dorkette: You're my safety net!
Dorky bookstore guy, seeing her: Aw, you're my safety net.

–The Strand, Broadway & 12th St

Overheard by: Ian