Frat boy #1: Dude, you got really skinny. What’s going on with you? Are you sick or something?
Frat boy #2: Yeah, bro, I have IBS — Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
Frat boy #1: You shittin’ me!
–91st & 1st
Overheard by: AZS
Frat boy #1: Dude, you got really skinny. What’s going on with you? Are you sick or something?
Frat boy #2: Yeah, bro, I have IBS — Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
Frat boy #1: You shittin’ me!
–91st & 1st
Overheard by: AZS
10-year-old boy #1: So, I’ll beat up the boys, and you beat up the girls.
10-year-old boy #2: Yeah! I love hitting girls!
–78th & 4th, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: Becka
Seventh grader #1: When you get a Brazilian wax they wax in your butt, too!
Seventh grader #2: I don’t think I have hair in my butt.
Seventh grader #3: Actually, one time in sixth grade you bent over and I saw it.
–Locker room, Asphalt Green, 90th & York
Hoochie #1: He was so drunk he just pushed my legs together and started humping them.
Hoochie #2: How did that work? Wasn’t it dry?
Hoochie #1: He was sweating so much it acted like lube!
–86th & 3rd
Overheard by: Peter
Columbia girl #1: His parents invited me out to Greenwich this weekend, so I took time off from my internship and was all ready to go…
Columbia girl #2: You’re not going to go?
Columbia girl #1: Well, no. You know that rash I had on my right boob? It’s back.
Columbia girl #2: No way!
Columbia girl #1: Seriously. You’re not getting that thing near a bikini with my future mother-in-law anywhere nearby. She sniffs stuff like that out in no time. Like a bloodhound.
–E 74th St & Park
Drunk girl to couple making out: Whoa, get a room!
Boy, looking up and recognizing drunk girl: Hey! Wow! How have you been?
Drunk girl: Oh my god… And all this time I thought you were gay.
–59th & Lex
20-ish WASP in fur coat on cell: Don’t you have a bowl? [Sigh] Do you have a bottle of tonic or, like, an apple or a traffic cone? Well, I’m sure there is something in your apartment I can make a bong out of.
80-ish Jewish woman: That’s an inappropriate conversation if I ever heard one…
20-ish WASP in fur coat: Whatever, that was my boss.
–Elevator, 62nd & 2nd
Middle-aged lady: Wait — isn’t there supposed to be a separation between church and space?
Young lady: No! Well, yes…
–87th & Lex
Overheard by: hbomb
JAP #1: When I grow up I want to be purple.
JAP #2: What? I’m putting that on Facebook!
JAP #1: Why? I was just talking to myself… Fuck, I was talking to myself.
–82nd & Lex
Mother: And how do you stop the smoke from going through the crack under the door? Put… a… wet…
Toddler girl: Firefighter?
–77th & 1st
