Study group girl #1: I totally had no idea that hepatitis had anything to do with your liver.
Study group girl #2: Oh, I know! I thought it was just a disease. You know, like AIDS.
–Hormann Library, Wagner College, Staten Island
Study group girl #1: I totally had no idea that hepatitis had anything to do with your liver.
Study group girl #2: Oh, I know! I thought it was just a disease. You know, like AIDS.
–Hormann Library, Wagner College, Staten Island
Bimbette: So, where you going for winter break?
Idiot dude: Switzerland.
Bimbette: Oh, cool, cool… What do they speak there, again?
Idiot dude: I dunno…
Bimbette: Hmmm… Dutch?
Idiot dude: Yeah, yeah, Dutch!
–78th St, between Park & Madison
Overheard by: dont speak ever again
Bimbette #1: Oh my god, shamans are, like, so in right now!
Bimbette #2: Really?!
Bimbette #1: Yeah! Like, every day I wake up and it’s like, shaman-this and shaman-that.
–50th & 6th
High school girl #1: Imagine posing for all of these artists.
High school girl #2: Yeah, but you’d be standing around naked all of the time.
High school girl #1: You probably didn’t have to be entirely naked.
–Vollard exhibit, the Met
Bimbette #1: My school doesn’t give out our grades ’til three days after the semester.
Bimbette #2: Wow! My school sucks. We have to wait 72 hours.
–Manhattan-bound N train from Brooklyn
Overheard by: Steve
Woman to friend: It just wasn’t what they imagined when they dreamed of going to jail.
–5th Ave, Park Slope
Overheard by: MK
LA bimbette to another: I think, like, everyone I know has been arrested. I mean, like, who hasn’t been charged with a drunk and disorderly at least once?
–R train
Chick to friend: Yeah, he got a lot of gold chains, but that’s an investment… That’s bail.
–Bus, Port Authority
Guy leaving subway: Hey, baby, I’m home! One more day and I’m not in jail!
–Subway entrance, 125th St
Overheard by: Leaving Harlem
Teen thug: Man, I never had to spend Valentine’s Day with my mom… If her boyfriend wasn’t in jail she wouldn’t be bothering me.
–Eastern Pkwy Library
Chick to boyfriend: So, that’s what you learned in prison?
–Central Park
Chick #1 reading can: ‘Pineapple chunks in its own juices.’ Ewww.
Chick #2: Hey, at least it doesn’t say ‘Pineapple chunks in his own juices.’
Chick #1: Why would it say that?!
–D’Agostinos, 78th & York
Female student #1: I feel bad for Czar Nicholas, because not only did he get overthrown and exiled, but Rasputin came in while he was gone and messed up his whole country.
Female student #2: What, you mean like in Anastasia?
Female student #1: No, I mean in, like, real life. The movie was based off real life.
Female student #2: Wait, you mean Rasputin was real?
–Bleecker & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Andrew
Girl #1: He was, like, a total dick, you know? But it’s like, he’s allowed to be, you know?
Girl #2: Well, yeah. He’s a straight NYU guy who plays soccer.
Girl #1: Yeah. So he could get away with it.
–Cantor Film Center, NYU
Overheard by: not an nyu straight guy
Chick #1 perusing lunch specials: God, that is so guh-ross!
Chick #2: What now?
Chick #1: That bloody roast beef thing right there… All of that red meat… It’s the flesh of animals! It’s so cruel and it makes me sick. I’m a total vegan these days.
Chick #2: Huh. Wait, didn’t you have a bacon and egg sandwich this morning?
Chick #1, haughtily: Yeah, but that’s not the actual flesh of any animal, now is it?
Chick #2: Wow. You are the first real idiot I’ve ever met.
–Cafe Europa, 6th Ave
Overheard by: BellaStella
