30-ish woman #1: I really didn’t know what a blowjob was ’til I was, like, really old.
30-ish woman #2: You mean until you actually had it in your mouth?
–Cobble Hill
30-ish woman #1: I really didn’t know what a blowjob was ’til I was, like, really old.
30-ish woman #2: You mean until you actually had it in your mouth?
–Cobble Hill
Girl: There’s no way that dog’s mouth is cleaner than mine.
Guy #1: It’s true. Dogs’ mouths are cleaner.
Girl: He was just licking his ass.
Guy #2: You should lick your ass. Maybe you’d be nicer [laughs].
Guy #1: Yeah! [High fives guy #2]. Seriously, though, I’ll lick your ass if you want.
Girl: You sicken me.
–Central Park Zoo
Overheard by: Wrong place right time
Headline by: Jon A.
Runners-Up:
· “At Least Rover Licks My Ass with His Pinky Out Like a Gentleman.” – KMW
· “Central Park Zoo: The Human Exhibit” – SAtCW
· “I’m Not Hearing a “No”” – x halloween jack x
· “My Two Dads: 2007” – SAtCW
Guy: … And I had a really weird dream last night.
Girl: Oh, yeah? About what?
Guy: Mass murder.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Taking the stairs next time
Lady #1: Our holiday was so great! You have to come to my house to see the photos!
Lady #2: Sure, I’ll be happy to!
Lady #1: First of all I’m going to show you the pictures of my dogs. Then I’ll show you my aunt’s photos, and then I’ll show you my kids.
–Grocery store
Slut #1: I love how you’re, like, so minimal in your buttoning.
Slut #2: That’s because I’m a slut.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: should have asked for a favor
Young man: So, since you last saw me, I’ve decided to become a vegetarian.
Young girl: What’s that? Like fish or somethin’?
–F train
Overheard by: kathy iandoli
Girl: Men are dicks.
Friend: It’s alright. You’ll get a new guy soon — you’re cute!
Girl: I know. I’m just sad.
Friend: Well, the sun will come out tomorrow. Have you ever heard of it being cloudy forever? No, because that’s impossible… Except for after a nuclear holocaust, in which case you should just kill yourself.
–4th & Mercer
Chick #1: I don’t know why it isn’t working!
Chick #2: Maybe you should get shit-faced.
Chick #3: Maybe you should try a push-up bra.
–23rd & 6th
Overheard by: Is there a 3rd solution?
Woman to Eric*: Are you a sexual adventurer?
Man: Eric is the Amerigo Vespucci of ass play.
–Against the Grain, East Village
Overheard by: Adam
Chick: There you go with that booty!
Booty-toting friend: You like that booty?
Chick: Yeah, that’s a nice booty. I just want to smack that booty right now!
–Columbia
