Girl: Well, Christy works with three people who are getting sex changes.
Guy: Yeah, but she works at a vegan restaurant.
–Ave A & St. Mark’s Place
Overheard by: jenny wallace
Girl: Well, Christy works with three people who are getting sex changes.
Guy: Yeah, but she works at a vegan restaurant.
–Ave A & St. Mark’s Place
Overheard by: jenny wallace
Hipster chick #1: I wish they had a whole pizza made of crust. I would so buy it.
Hipster chick #2: Me, too!
Queer: You mean bread?
–Pino’s La Forchetta, Park Slope
Middle-aged Italian man #1: I’s a-gonna buy dis pickle. It’s been six months since I hadda pickle. I don’t eat no pickles lately.
Middle-aged Italian man #2: Why not?
Middle-aged Italian man #1: I dunno. Every time it’s like I’m-a suckinacock.
–fruit stand near Hamilton & Columbia, Fort Hamilton
Mother to little girl: Eat your vegetables.
Little girl: I’m opposed to vegetables.
Father: Hey, your brother is opposed to dating women, and apparently we’re letting that one slide.
–Jackson Hole, 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Casey girl
Drunk guy #1: Man, I gotta get laid tonight.
Drunk guy #2: I’m sure there’s a costume shop around here somewhere. You’d totally increase your chances if you wore a sailor outfit.
Drunk guy #1: Yeah… but I like pussy.
–44th & 8th
Overheard by: Peebs
Woman: She locked me in a dog crate and poured hot wax on me.
Random passerby: What kind of sex is she having?
–Canal St
Overheard by: Casstom
Older black gentleman in suit: Hey man, can you help me out?
Arab guy in limo smiles and says nothing.
Black man: I’m, uh, I’m lookin’ for someone to go home with tonight. ‘Cause I’m a gay guy, see. Well, I mean, I’m kind of a swing guy. I like to, uh… ascend to different levels.
Hipster guy walking past: What is it, like, a video game?
Black guy: Yeah! Yeah, baby, it’s a video game. ‘Cept when I win… I fuck you.
–44th & 6th
Overheard by: Peebs
Queer to his friend after hearing raucous cheering coming out of a bar: Straight people are tiresome, yet amusing at the same time.
–46th & 9th
Teen girl smelling a candle: Smells like lesbian.
–5 train
Overheard by: Nolan’s Lover
Guy: So, anyway, the short of it is, he is the only guy I ever slept with who didn’t end up giving me money. He was amazing.
Girl: Hmm-mm. I see.
–Houston & Mercer
Overheard by: Angela
Girl #1: You think if I set up a gay couple I’ll go to hell?
Girl #2: Oh, totally.
–L train
Overheard by: ellll to the moee
