Wednesday One-Liner Cheney

Guy to friends: She walks like she has a huge dick, that's how she walks!

–Office Building, 34th St & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Spacedog ears

Drunk guy: So I put my dick in the hard drive.

–10th St & Ave A

Overheard by: guy walking dow street friday

Girl on cell: I can't compete with his dick!

–L Train

Overheard by: fuhggedaboudit

Angry hot girl to friend: Even if he's the biggest swinging dick in the world, so what?

–10th St & 5th Ave

Overheard by: jennifer tobias

Angry middle-aged woman to silent husband: I come home, I want some gin and some dick.

–59th St & Lexington Ave

Overheard by: Dave

Posted on January 26, 2011
Compare/Contrast, Murray Hill and Gramercy, Penis, Trains Not Subway, Union Square and East Village, Upper East Side, Wednesday One-Liners Vary, West Village, Wishes & desires

One-Liners Melt in Your Mouth, Not in Your Wednesday

Girl: I would totally eat the shit out of a cupcake!

–St. Mark's Place

Mom to little boy crying after dropping popsicle: I'm not buying you another one!

–Central Park

Overheard by: Katherine

Thin blonde girl: I love food. I wish I could make love to this cookie…

–NYU

Very hot girl in expensive outfit to guy walking away: Oh, so looking at candy and toys is more important than my need to go to the bathroom?

–82nd & Central Park West

Posted on January 19, 2011
Central Park, Food, NYU, Sex & Relationships, Shopping, Union Square and East Village, Wednesday One-Liners Vary

Halfway Between Cuisine and Cow Slop.

Business casual 30-something #1: What is this, a halfway house?
Business casual 30-something #2: No, man, that's Chipotle.

–St. Mark's

Posted on January 11, 2011
Crime and Punishment, Ethnic Food, Questions, Union Square and East Village, Yuppies

…Yet

Cracked-out hobo, watching crazy hobo yelling in the distance: What the hell is his problem?
Bag lady: I don't know, must be on some drugs or suttin'. Damn, I'm so glad we not like that!

–St. Mark's

Overheard by: Ilikecandy

Posted on January 3, 2011
Bag ladies, Drugs, Hobos, Homeless, Questions, Union Square and East Village

Now Explain Tobago, Smartypants.

Little boy in a bodega to mom: Why do you have to be eighteen to buy tobacco? It's just a sauce!
Mom: No, sweetie, that's tabasco.
Little boy: Ohhhhhhhh.
Mom: Makes sense, ya?

–9th St & Ave A

Overheard by: hottamali

Posted on January 2, 2011
Age/Aging, Kids, Moms, Questions, Union Square and East Village, Words

I Prefer to Think Of Her As the Fountain Of Eternal Poon

Upright bassist: I want a really hot girlfriend who's like The Giving Tree, y'know, by Shel Silverstein.
More upright guitarist: Like, who gives and gives and never wants in return? Get real, man.
Bassist: I can dream, man.

–Union Square

Overheard by: The Glump