Union Square and East Village

Girl #1: Do you have a cold or something?
Girl #2: No…It’s my allergies. It’s not like this where I’m from.
Girl #1: Where are you from again?
Girl #2: Arizona.
Girl #1: Oh, pollen and stuff?
Girl #2: No, all these crowds and their germs. It’s not like that out West.

–C train

Overheard by: BBW

Girl: Shoot! I’m sorry.
Guy: So where are you from? Because I know it’s not New York if you say “shoot!”.

–Union Square Regal Cinemas

Overheard by: Jeff Hubbard

Guy on cell: Yeah, yeah, it’s pretty cool out here I guess…you should totally come visit…It’s just…sometimes I feel like New York is just one big Ann Arbor.

–Houston & Suffolk

Overheard by: jesse

Man: We’re not from here. We’re from Pennsylvania, where they’re normal.

–B63 bus

Waiter: How was everything tonight?
Woman: Absolutely wonderful! This was some of the best Mexican food I’ve ever had! And you can take my word for it. I’m from Colorado. We know Mexican food.

–Mexico Lindo, 2nd Avenue

Overheard by: Carol

Guy #1: It’s a morning-after pill.
Guy #2: For him or her?

–6th Street & 2nd Avenue

Charity mugger: Excuse me, do you have a minute to talk about Children International?
Guy: Yeah…right.
Charity mugger: You don’t have to be such a jerk about it.
Guy: Actually I do. You see, that’s sort of my thing.

–Union Square South

Overheard by: stu-ee

A hobo has a cardboard sign that says “Ninjas killed parents, need money for Kugn [sic] Fu lessons.”

A cop comes up, and the hobo says: I don’t know why. I’ve already had five police come by and bother me today.

–14th & 5th

Overheard by: Casey

(cf. This guy.)

Woman #1: Oh, look over there… that is just tragic.
Woman #2: What?
Woman #1: Ugly twins.

–15th & 5th

Overheard by: Manhattman

Drunk Asian girl: We should totally go salsa dancing.
Drunk white girl: Yeah, that would be so fun.
Drunk Asian girl: We’d be the only white people there, though.

–J train

Overheard by: Jim VB

NYU girl: So do they like hate everyone?
NYU boy: No, not everyone; just white people.

–Union Square

Old lady #1: What are you eating? It smells good.
Old lady #2: Nicorette.

–DR2 theater, E. 15th Street

Girl #1: What do you mean? What are pajama bottoms?
Girl #2: You know, like those cotton pants you buy at Old Navy.
Girl #1: I don’t know what you’re talking about but I have 3 pair.

–University & 12th

Chick: He was not really completely gay.
Guy: What was he, then?
Chick: He was more just completely fabulous.

–10th & Broadway

Overheard by: jennifer

Girl: I’m pathetic enough but not fabulous enough to be a fag hag.

–The Ansonia, 73rd & Broadway

Overheard by: Betty Noir

Girl #1: You shouldn’t feel sorry for yourself. We are single and fabulous, explanation point.
Girl #2: …Don’t you mean “exclamation point”?

–Garden Cafe, Inwood

Guy #1: …I walked in and the warehouse was just full of tiny little boots.
Guy #2: That sounds fabulous.

–Central Park

Hobo: Hey, are you trying to get laid today?
Chick: No, not today.
Hobo: Well give me your number.

–Union Square